Struck: A Kakashi Hatake Fanfiction

Chapter Four: "Arsonist's Lullaby" Hozier

I took a deep breath as I studied myself in the bathroom mirror. My cheeks flushed as I remembered the way his eyes roamed over my body before we were interrupted. Kakashi Hatake: Assassin. Copy Ninja. Partner-to-be on the most important mission of my life. Also incredibly tempting...

Still buzzing from the drinks and the feel of his body against mine, I made my way back to the table and sat down. Kakashi was just standing up and saying his goodbyes. As he walked away I turned to Genma.

"I'm turning in for the night too. It was so good to see you, Genma." I said as I gave him a peck on the cheek.

"Aww, Emiko you can't leave too!" Naruto whined.

"We'll pick right back up when I get back from this mission, I promise." I winked.

I stood and waved to everyone else and made my exit. The cool night air sent a shiver down my spine as I headed towards my apartment.

The night was quiet and I was alone with my thoughts as I made my way through town. A night out had distracted me for a while, but now my mind was swimming with memories as I passed familiar restaurants and stores. Mom and Dad had been determined to make sure we knew Konoha and were part of the village even if we didn't live here. So when we made a rare stop home, they showed us everything.

Without meaning to, I found myself coming up on the shinobi memorial. I wiped at my eye as I approached and felt a wetness on my face; I had started crying and hadn't even realized. I sank to the ground at the foot of the rock and let the tears fall freely.

I have no one now. I gasped at the realization and my body began to shake uncontrollably with my grief.

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I hadn't really followed her, I told myself. This was my usual haunt after all. I was leaning on a tree with my arms crossed and I watched her posture change as she neared the memorial. When she fell to her knees and cry.

She was always a tough little thing when we were kids, I guess she still is. She's put on a brave face since she walked back into this village.

When her grief began to wrack through her body, I couldn't just watch anymore. When I got close, I put my hands on her shoulders and her streaked face snapped up at me in surprise.

"K-Kakashi?" she stammered as she wiped at the tears on her cheeks. "I didn't know anyone was here—"

"You can't keep bottling this up. Just let it out," I said as I knelt in front of her so we were eye to eye.

She looked back at me hesitantly, tears still streaming silently. "I—I don't even really know you—"

"But I know your pain, Emi. And I know what it'll do to you if I you keep it inside."

She was quiet for a second, taking in my words. "I've lost every person I've ever loved..." I whispered. "You can't take this with you on our mission, Emi."

I watched as she set her jaw tight and her lips started to tremble. Sobs were wrenched from her as she crashed into my chest. I put one hand on her back and let her ride it out.

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I cried until my body couldn't produce any more tears. I sobbed until my voice went hoarse. And still he stayed. He may have known me once...but now I was practically a stranger to him. He said he'd lost every person he'd ever loved...how was he still alive?This pain—how can anyone bear this?

I finally looked up at him when my outburst subsided. I expected his expression to be full of pity, but I only found understanding.

"I'm so sorry. I shouldn't—" I started before he cut me off.

"There's nothing for you to apologize for." His voice was strong and resolute. "Let's get you home."

He stood and put a gloved hand out to help me up. I took it and rose and he led the way to my apartment. We walked in silence for a while, enjoying the quiet of the night. We climbed the stairs at the bookstore and we paused at my door.

"I'm just...so...mad, Kakashi. More than any other feeling." I confessed in a hushed voice.

He nodded. "Anger is a strong emotion, Emiko. Don't let it rule you for long. We'll find who did this."

"Thank you...for tonight.It wasn't fair to put that on you but... thank you." I said looking up at him from beneath my lashes.

"I told you—everything you're feeling, I've felt." He reached out a hand and softly tucked some of my loose blonde strands behind my ear.

"Get some rest," he sighed before turning to leave. "And maybe drink some water for that hangover," he chuckled over his shoulder.

No sooner had the words left his mouth did I begin to feel a dull ache begin behind my eyes. I groaned and unlocked the door. I took his advice and downed a glass of water, along with some ibuprofen, before I climbed into bed.

Staring up the ceiling, my thoughts swirled. But I felt a little lighter than I had before. And for that, I was grateful for Kakashi Hatake.  

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My dreams that night were different. Instead of Rin...my mind was full of her. The light floral scent of her hair. The feel of her curves on my body. Her voice. The soft features of her beautiful face—so fierce and yet so innocent all at the same time.

When I awoke, the guilt began to seep through me. I only had room for one woman in my dreams, and it certainly was not supposed to be little Emiko Akiyama...

I shook my head and ran a hand through my messy hair. Maybe a shower would clear my thoughts. I stretched and headed to the bathroom. As the steam began to plume around me, I let the warm jets of water cascade down my body until her scent no longer lingered there.