FUCKED.

22

Sapphire, ever the beacon of support, had some news. "I bought a new apartment downtown. It's way bigger and cozier," she said, her voice carrying an excitement that was contagious.

"We'll take care of the baby, okay?" she added, placing her hand gently on my stomach. I nodded, feeling a mix of gratitude and uncertainty.

"Whatever happened between you and Kassif wasn't pleasant, but he left with a good mistake," Sapphire continued. "I don't want you thinking of aborting the child, baby girl." Her concern was genuine, and I appreciated it despite my own conflicted feelings.

"I still can't believe T told me to keep this thing inside me. I can't keep this knowing who the father is. Forgive me for my words, but it's true," I said, my voice laced with frustration. Sapphire took my hands in hers, trying to offer comfort.

"Whatever you do, don't harm yourself or your child. Since I know you're eight weeks pregnant and can't abort, I'd advise you not to take pills, okay?" She smacked me lightly on the arm and smiled. I managed a weak smile in return.

TWO WEEKS EARLIER

I woke up feeling dizzy and nauseous, unable to stand because the light was blinding. Groaning, I tried to remove the tubes connected to me.

"Ah, Ms. Jackson... I wouldn't do that if I were you. It's not safe," a nurse said, entering the room.

"Well, it's also not safe for someone who doesn't know me to scrutinize me, so fuck off," I snapped. She smirked, stepping closer.

"I know girls like you—trying to sleep with big men, and when they don't pay up, you come lying that you've been defiled. I've seen it before," she sneered.

"I may be weak, but I haven't lost my sharp tongue. Judging by your sore ring finger and tired eyes, I'd say your husband's getting it elsewhere. And since she's black, you're trying to pin this on me. Next time you pull that card, I swear I'll make sure you regret it," I threatened, causing her to back away in panic.

"Excuse me, no visitors allowed," the nurse said, but Sapphire entered with a cheerful attitude, ignoring her completely.

"Listen, I don't entertain desperate clowns, nor do I tolerate thirsty bitches. So, I'd suggest you suck some dick and come back with a better poker face next time," Sapphire said, her smile cold as the nurse fled.

"I have a lot to tell you, Chloe, and you have to promise me you won't do anything rash," Sapphire said, taking my hands in hers.

"But are you okay?" I asked, feeling overwhelmed. "I know it's hard, but Sapphire is always here for you."

"Don't want to talk about it, Sapphire. That journey was wrong, but I still went through it. It's all my fault, you know," I said, my voice breaking.

"It's my fault! It's my own fucking fault! I deserved this, and if you don't want to blame me, you can walk out!" I yelled, my emotions spiraling out of control. I started throwing things and screaming, unable to control the rage and despair within me. Sapphire tried to calm me down, but I was beyond reasoning.

"Don't do this, Iris. Please, I'd do anything for my friends. Don't hurt them—don't, please. I just blacked out," I said, my voice trailing off as I lost consciousness. When I woke up a few times that week, I saw Sapphire sleeping beside me or Hunter sitting on the couch. I had nightmares of Iris, and the doctors had to give me sleeping pills to rest.

One morning, I woke up feeling extremely dizzy and nauseous, throwing up nine times before noon. I knew I was pregnant, but I wasn't ready to face it.

Two days later, a doctor arrived with Travis and Sapphire in tow. I couldn't look at Travis, knowing the pain he had caused me. The doctor examined me and offered pills, but my mind was fixated on the unwanted pregnancy.

"I know you all know I'm pregnant, but when do I get to abort this bastard?" I demanded, my frustration evident.

"Absolutely not, Chloe. You're keeping the baby. You're not in the right state of mind. Let's give it a few more weeks," Travis tried to reason.

"I FUCKING WANT IT OUT OF ME NOW!" I screamed, grabbing the doctor's coat.

"Baby, listen, you can't kill an innocent child because of the sperm donor. That's heartless. You're not like that. Please, calm down. We love you and want what's best for you," Travis said, kissing my forehead. His heartfelt plea was touching, but it didn't change my mind.

"I WILL NEVER RAISE A BASTARD! YOU CAN WATCH ME GET IT ABORTED OR GIVE IT UP FOR ADOPTION, BUT DON'T TRY TO STOP ME OR I'LL KILL MYSELF!" I threatened, staring out the window, ignoring their pleas.

The days that followed were excruciating. Sapphire was relentless, not allowing me any privacy. She hovered over me, even while I tried to brush my teeth or use the bathroom. Her overprotectiveness became unbearable, but I eventually gave up on the idea of abortion. Adoption seemed like the only option left, a safer and more secure path for the baby.