My Idol or Soulmate?

Chapter XVI -> Forgiveness is a powerful cure

It was all I wanted you to say and do, ask me for forgiveness. Singto, I would never be able to let you go. Despite everything that happened. People may think I am crazy or foolish and maybe I am but so be it, I don't care about that because there is someone much more important that I do care about.

Are you sure? Even though I can be terribly insecure, shy and supremely awkward at expressing myself, even though I mess things up, think much too rational? Even though I....

Singto, shush, I want you as you are not a "superperfect" versions cause then you wouldn't be Singto anymore.

Aren't you angry for everything that happened?

I haven't been very angry but I was terribly disappointed. At first you seemed to like me, allowed me into your life and then you shoved me out with equal force. I might have had a burst of rage but no real anger.

At least let my do one thing to make it up a bit to you,

Why do you need to make up for something that is forgiven? I do not forgive to remember it and use it against you,

I myself am not convinced that something like this should be so easily forgiven. Don't yet say you forgive me but go home and wait for my invitation, it won't be long, I must prepare something

Krist Pov

And in that not so subtle fashion I was worked out of the door, "it won't be long", he had clarified that to mean a max of 4 hours. At least the cold was out of the air but that didn't mean everything was fine and alright. Why must I have such a complex mate? Why couldn't he just accept things for himself? It's a blessing and curse that he's your mate. Wow since when did you become intelligent? Are you insulting me? Who else? You am I and I am You, so, something spinned around in my head, what?! You just insulted me but since I am you that means you insulted yourself. Who are you even to mess in my affairs? I am your shadow, shadow?? Your conscience, in tikes you cannot think straight your rational thinking or when you can't access your emotions I am you emotional side. I am always the opposite of what you feel and think, go away, I don't need you!
Really Krist? Yes, how many times did I prevent you making an impulsive mistake? Ehm, Uncountable? 😁 that's nothing to laugh about. Remember my advice in the beginning? About his character? Didn't you notice how much effort the whole conversation today took him? Don't you get it what a delicate personality he has? If I didn't tell you these things you'd never notice and just go on like a sledgehammer pulverized everything it encounters.
Still I'd rather be a sledgehammer than a needle.
Rather a sledgehammer? Have you even some working braincells in your head or is there just a massive vacuum underneath your skull? Singto needs to be treated carefully not with the big steps and bulldozing way of your character, don't you get it? Learn to adapt, he is desperately trying to open himself up to you yet you don't help him at all. You only push him back into his shell when he gets a bit out. How do you mean? He is a person who needs time and space to think and prepare if he is gonna open up, if you chase him or don't grant him space he will feel very uncomfortable, besieged and chased. That feeling equals to what a claustrophobic person feels inside a stuck elevator. So I might have a part in what happened? Think of how he reacted to your presence, I am talking about him getting some time alone. I don't believe he was leaving you, he was preparing to get back to you with new resolve and a firm answer and determination. But to get this determination he needed time to think, so when it comes to these things he is simply terribly slow and needs time and space? Basically. So in the end I might bear part of the blame? It is not your fault, but your actions didn't help improves the chances of a more positive outcome of the situation. You just didn't grasp his personality and up and until now you still haven't. How can I? I first need to get to know him. Can't you read the signs? Signs? What signs? People display signs that can gives hints on what/how they are feeling. Like him everting eye contact? I'd call that evidence instead of a hint but that is something you might think of yeah. So basically I must treat Singto like a massive vase? Yep, fragile.