Wendy's Return

Chapter 4 ~Where Are You?*

Pan liked how everything about Lily seemed to glow. Her hair was the same color as the bonfire in front of him. Her skin was flushed, almost looking like the color red itself. Right then, her hazel eyes glowed. It was because she was trying to tell him something important.

"I..." Lily looked up at him undecided.

Pan laughed as his tiger hesitated. "Yes, my love?"

All at once it felt like all the air had left his lungs. Pan pulled Lily into a hug as he sucked in more of the night air around them. It was what he used to call Wendy.

My love.

Neverland blasted a gush of cold air at them just as she whispered to Pan, "I...love you." Lily's flame colored hair swirled alongside the real bonfire in front of them.

Pan did his best to smile down at her. "As do I, little tiger." His words sounded true enough, but Pan knew deep down that they were not his words. Lily looked up at him with another surprised blush painting across her cheeks. He simply pulled her into his chest yet again and he felt her arms wrap around his back instantly.

Pan looked past her hair and into the fire for a moment as he processed the warmth in his stomach. His body liked her close. It made him feel like he wasn't falling to pieces. It was a pleasant distraction. Pan was almost enjoying himself. But again, his mind punished him.

His body may want his Tiger Lily, but his mind would remain disgusted of her.

Needy. Clingy. Annoying. Childish.

Not her.

As Pan thought that, a movement in the forest caught his attention. And suddenly it felt like gravity was no longer held him to Neverland. The only reason he didn't topple forward, the only reason he was still able to breathe, was because of Lily.

Because his old love was standing right in front of him. It was her furious brown eyes that made it clear to him that she was real. She wasn't an angel, but a ghost. An angry spirit haunting him. Wendy never looked away from his eyes. Her fists clenched and unclenched.

Pan always knew she was angry at him in the end.

He always knew she hated him for letting Ursula torture her.

For taking London out from underneath her feet.

For murdering her childhood.

Pan took a shaky breath and held onto Lily even tighter. He needed her for support. She was the only thing keeping Pan from destroying himself.

Pan closed his eyes fearfully tight.

Stop torturing me....

I don't want you anymore...

He held in his scream for Lily's sake.

Leave us alone.

When Pan opened his eyes he saw her fade away. He looked around the camp to see if the Lost Boys had noticed her, but they were all too busy being lost. Lily was still tucked into his shoulder.

He looked back desperately unsure of himself and saw a magnificent creature. The wolf looked at him...rather sadly. Rudolph's wolf was brown, this one was a beautiful pure white. Pan didn't bother checking to see if he had any fellow witnesses. No one was screaming. Pan's green eyes locked onto its one red eye and a cold chill washed over him...but he was never cold.

When the wolf howled and then ran off into the Dark Jungle, Pan didn't bother chasing it down. He somehow knew what the animal was telling him.

The camp finally settled down with Lost Boys asleep in the dirt they stomped upon all night long. Lily was practically asleep in his arms when Pan murmured for her to get to bed and would meet her there in a moment.