WORKING FOR STYLES

27. Blues

Authors Note: Hello :) I hope you still love me – I’m trying to update ASAP!!! I’m at home at the moment – had root canal surgery this morning it was intense and HORRIBLE!!!! I love y’all so much though… seriously J I’m dedicating this chapter to a dear friend who, well really I don’t really know what I would do with out. I wasn’t sure if shed accept me for me when I spoke to her – and its like we were tim tams and tea (an aussie thing) where everything just meshed so well. ;) ayyeeeeeeee thank you Rach! I have big day tomorrow y’all – dentist app because my teeth have been killing me and a work interview – woo. Wish me luck hahaha for both obviously. PS! When I write from the first person and not as Kat or Harry – don’t take it as me but as part of the experience of this chapter! So no “omg did you get your heart broken?” comments lo lly x x x Super unedited today – just wanted y’all to read!

            X x x  PLEASE VOTE AND COMMENT <3 IT HELPS A LOT! x x X

Playlist

Kiss me – Ed Sheeran

Higher love – James Vincent McMorrow

Tenerfire Sea – Ed Sheeran

Heart Beats  - Jose Gonzalez

Slow it down – The Lumineers

 

"How!" She yells taking a step toward me, nearly closing the space between us.

"Because Im in love with you" I whisper thinking she wouldn't hear me, but I know she did because she dropped her cigarette on the glazed marble floor. She stairs at, eyes watering. 

"We have - well you have been amazing. Such a good friend to me Harry" she speaks looking down at the floor. 

"Look Kat, i have many friends and you know i love you not like a friend" I pause taking her hand.

"I knew i would regret this. You know what? No i don’t fucking regret this because i love you and i'm not afraid to let you know - well - because you're all i think about" i say, confident. She looks glass eyed up at me: The blue, that of a perfect summer sky. My breath shortens as she begins to speak. 

Chapter 27

 Blues

What is love exactly? It’s this fantasy world where all is mended, beautiful and perfect; a euphoria. But love – if you’ve found it… isn’t really all that. Its full of many other things; jealousy, hatered, envy, desire and lust blah blah blah. That’s if you found it of course… but what is lost love? The love that you had, that was perfect … that you lost? It’s a whole new fucking ball game. You see, I want to caution you if you haven’t already experienced that first love… Mine was great… it was beautiful, magical even… full of everything you could even imagine. But believe it or not I know how it feels to be fallen out of love from. The man of my dreams… he stopped loving me… and not for any particular reason but for the one that – he just didn’t love me? Can anyone prepare for that? To be fallen out of love from… well you can’t. Its just a shit go. So next time your in fantasy land, make sure you don’t love the person your with more than they love you – or you’ll find your self in a bit of a pickle folks.

 

Katerina’s Point of View

You see, moments that take me back to two years ago when my heart was first broken seem to just resonate with me. How can one really move on from a painful experience? I mean, people who get into car crashes don’t get into car’s ever again – like my auntie. One car crash, and she will never again get into a car. Well at least behind the wheel. You see with love – its much like a car wreckage when is falls apart, and you swear to your self you will never get into the drivers seat to drive down that journey again. But here I am, down the road I didn’t intend to drive on. The road I didn’t get into the drivers seat to get to… and some how I am here. On the road… driving toward a wreckage. It makes me almost laugh at it, considering I use to tell Sarah how love is something you let in and when you do you will let it kill you every day – all day. And I thought it was so damn beautiful but its not… not with Nick – he fucked that up for me and now all I see is the person I once was. A girl who slept with people to fill the gaps I left to be sober.