i've been thinking about this for a while now, i'm just too scared to write it

ＮＥＯＰＨＯＢＩＡ [1 . 1]

ⅲ.

[ fear of anything new ]

❤

i'm scared of starting my new job.

there was once a girl, blessed with nine lives.

in her first life, she was spoiled with beauty and gold. 

in her first life, her name was lidiya. as soon as she turned sixteen, she was married off to a handsome prince, elias, that ruled a kingdom by the sea.

her days were spent scavenging for the shiniest pearls from the sea and the reddest rubies embedded into the walls of the throne room, while her husband was out hunting.

her nights were spent lying on their luscious, seafoam bed engraved with opals, lying in her own pool of blood as he raped her over and over again.

she was lonely. so, so lonely trapped inside a tall tower above the brilliant aquamarine ocean around her. she watched the fish swim and wished that she could be as free as them—to swim to any destination at any time.

her loneliness was a terrible sickness. or perhaps, a cure—the thoughts inside her head had never quite been the same. 

when elias stopped coming home at night, she carved the skin from her hand with the edge of a ruby and fed it to the fish below her. she did this religiously each night, carving skin from different parts of her body until she was finally with the ocean.

she was finally free.

𝚃𝙷𝙴 𝚆𝙸𝙽𝙳 𝙿𝙸𝙲𝙺𝙴𝙳 up, rattling the pages of her old notebook. Vaire blinked and glanced up, taken back at the peeks of the sunrise ahead. She snapped her notebook shut and dusted the bits of grass off her jeans, stretching as she stood.

Around two in the morning, she'd woken up and couldn't get back to sleep. Somehow in the middle of the night, she'd found this quiet meadow behind the cabins to continue her writing. 

The grass grew uphill, with some scraggly trees that slowly grew into a forest past the mountains.

The best part, was that there was not a single person in sight. 

Yawning, she took the earbuds out of her ears stepped out of the long grass to head home.

As she quietly padded up the front steps, the scent of bacon and eggs drifted in the crisp, morning air. Vaire quickly shut the door to keep the cold outside, hanging her coat over the sofa.

"Morning, mom," Vaire said, walking into the kitchen. "Are you feeling better? Did your take the tablets I left you?"

There was a tense, blatant awkwardness between them as she waited for her reply. 

Mom fried the eggs, her gaze trained on the pan, "yes, yes I did. Thank you."

Vaire peered at the cans of tomatoes and mushrooms on the counter. She was pleasantly surprised to see mom actually using them. "Need any help?"