Do you know how to remove this feeling out of my chest cause it actually fucking hurts more than my first breakup. I hate this kind of feeling where i keep thinking positive but it actually comes out negative. For example when i actually thought he was falling for me when in reality he's not. I dont know what to do with life hating me. Better yet, i want to die and if i die this feeling wouldnt be there. I want him to feel what i feel right now where there's no one here with u and when it actually fucking hurts. Crying isnt the best option right now but that's what im doing and cannot stop. Just wanna curl up in a corner think of all my mistakes. 1) for loving him 2) for even falling him. Those are the reason why im fucking crying and when i couldnt contain them in a container. 2019 has yet given me the most heartbreaking day/week to remember, its not even the 6 month of 2019 and i already have the heartbreak. I know my irl friends are here but ibsfs was there when i started falling and they know that im hurting. I want hugs from them right now where i just cry on their shoulders and never ever let them go, knowing they wouldnt let me go and just laugh at me while crying. when in real life my friends just try to comfort and laugh while im crying. I shouldnt have fallen for him. Shouldnt have loved him. This actually fucking hurts and i want to die and never feel this again. Yanna's dumb for falling and loving him in the first place. I hate him. I want him to feel this instead of me.
