Random Hamilton Stories!

Phillip's "Duel"

(AYOYOYOYOYOOO- THIS STORY KINDA LONG, LIKE 1746 WORDZ SO LIKE YEAAA)
(Warning: Ze Curse Words)

Phillip angrily threw open the door to his house, stalking inside. 

"Phillip, welcome home!" Eliza smiled. 

"Thanks, Ma. Where's pa?" 

"He's in his study, dear." 

Phillip walked up the stairs to his father's office, yanking the door open. 

Alexander turned around to face his son. "Ph-"

"IF THERE'S ONE THING I HATE MORE THAN ANYTHING IN THIS WORLD ITS PEOPLE WHO TALK SHIT ABOUT OTHERS FOR THEIR OWN SELF BENEFIT! THAT ASSHOLE GEORGE EACKER! HAS THE NERVE TO CALL ME A 'RASCAL'! AND SAY SHIT ABOUT YOU! I PRACTICALLY ALMOST SHOT HIM RIGHT THERE! ..If I..had a gun. BUT ANYWAYS! I CHALLENGED-" 

"Phillip, Phillip! Please, calm down."

 "But he-"

 "I know what he did. Chill out." 

Phillip nodded.

"Okay..you were going to say you challenged him to a duel?" 

"Yeah. I came to ask you for advice..I've never been in one of these before. And you know that they're not going to teach us how to shoot guns at boarding school." 

Alex laughed a bit. "Yeah...so where is this happening?" 

"New Jersey." 

Alexander sighed. "Everything's always legal at New Jersey. Okay..so. This is what you do. When you're finished counting your steps, aim your gun towards the sky. If he's truly a man of honor, he'll see you don't want to fight and won't shoot." 

Phillip cocked his head to the side. 

"But..what if he's not? Pops, he could kill me! I have to shoot at him." 

"Phillip, no. I don't think you should attempt to kill someone." 

"Father.." 

"Phillip, trust me, it'll be okay. Here, take my gun-" 

"NO!"

The two turned around, Eliza was there. She looked furious.

 "Eliza?"

 "Mom?" 

"Phillip, you will do NO such THING!" Eliza stomped over to the men, snatching Alexander's guns out of his hands. "My GOD, Alexander! Are you really THAT dumb?! Our son could DIE out there! Were you REALLY going to send him off, and tell him NOT to shoot?! What is WRONG with you?!"

 Alexander was speechless. He didn't know what to say.

Eliza turned to Phillip. "AND YOU!" She pulled on his ear. He winced. 

"Agh! Ma, stop!" 

Eliza only yanked more. "Don't EVER use that kind of language! It's rude and inappropriate! And DON'T ever solve problems with violence! It's NOT right!"

"Okay, okay I promise! Please, please let go!!"

 Finally, she did. "Now. I want you to come with me, and we'll settle this peacefully."

 "But!-" 

"No BUTS! You're both acting like children, so we're settling this like children."

 Phillip groaned. "But ma, I promised these girls I would meet up with them and-" He stopped himself mid sentence. "Never mind."