[for you] // why don't we ~ tom holland

t i z e n n y o l c

i ran over to him, cradling him in my arms. he turned around and buried himself in my hoodie. he was still crying. very intensely. i went back and closed his bedroom door so i could talk to him and so jack wouldn't hear us.

i know i said i don't keep secrets from jack but if zach didn't want anyone else to know, then i wasn't going to tell anybody.

"what's wrong?" i asked. i gently grabbed his hands and looked him in the eyes. pain and fear.

"i-i- they keep hurting me violet" he broke down into tears once again. i knew he was talking about the boys in his grade that were constantly pestering him and wouldn't leave him alone.

"it's okay. i'll protect you. i'll be here, always" i responded quietly and lifted him up so we could talk. "do you know why they're doing this?" he didn't respond. he looked away and fixed his gaze on his backpack.

"i- i have to tell y-you some-something" he said choking on his words. i looked at him with hope in my eyes. i gave him a comforting look so he wouldn't feel pressured. "i like guys..." he finally said. "i'm sorry" he couldn't look at me and pulled his hands away from mine.

"what are you sorry about?" i asked confused. my little brother just came out to me and he was sorry??

"don't you hate me? for being gay?" he said staring into my eyes. i almost started laughing but it wasn't the right time.

"of course not! zach i would never hate you for anything you do. and i'll be here. you can always come and talk to me, i will always support you" i gave him a reassuring smile and i immediately saw his face brighten up. he jumped at me and pulled me into a tight hug. i smiled at him.

————

2:01 am

me and jack decided to stay up all night because neither of us could sleep. we watched netflix, ate food, scrolled through instagram, and just basically talked about life.

"what if.. what if my life is someone else's dream?" i asked. "which i guess wouldn't really make sense because this would be a really long and fucked up dream" i told him, laughing. i layed on my bed, staring at the ceiling with my phone in my left hand. i felt my it vibrate, not wanting to look at what it was but i did anyway. tom replied to my text from like 7 hours ago.

tom
do you wanna talk?

me
otp?

tom
sure.

this sounds weird but this was gonna be my first time actually talking with him on the phone.

————

jack was passed out on my bed, taking up nearly the whole thing. me and tom talked for a while but then he said he'd go to bed. i don't blame him. it was tuesday today which meant we had school. i don't know who invented school but that person must've been pretty lonely to have so many disgusting kids be in one place at once. because they were forced to.

that's the way i see things. my mom always tells me to try and see the bright side of things but even if i try, i still don't see it. i always stick with the negative. we're all gonna die anyway so why does it matter?

5:13 am

i had one more hour and about 30 minutes until i would have to start getting ready for school. i wouldn't even call it sleeping, i guess i just took a nap.

jack woke me up in time to get ready. i didn't want to go to school. i didn't want to talk to jonah or daniel and maybe not even tom. and i k is that sounded bad but i just felt like i needed some alone time.

————

the next thing i remembered was waking up. everything felt okay, but different. like if i just woke up for real. if i had been dreaming.

{author's note}
you'll see what i did.
this umm... book if you wanna call it a 'book' is coming to and end lol bye luv u.