IDontWantToBeYouAnymore

Chapter 4

Journal 2/2/14 (2:03 am):

I lived in the pack's house since I was 13 years old, my parents had died in a rogue attack.

Well... my mom did, she jumped in front of the Luna when a hunter had shot her with silver bullets.

The alpha was very grateful, my father, however, killed himself two days after. I understand, no mate can survive with the death of their mate. It wasn't a myth... no, I found out the hard way.

The Luna took care of me, treated me as a daughter she never had until I was 15. Then she went missing, the alpha took it hard at first but as time passed he adapted, he still looks for her and it brings him comfort knowing she's not dead or being hurt physically at least or else he would feel it.

Although things changed with the pack once she left, it was as if a piece of a puzzle was missing. But nobody talked about it, it was a taboo subject which made me become invisible.

I wasn't bothered or bullied, mainly cause of my mother's action but everyone always looks at me with pity. It's unusual to have an orphan in a pack; orphans tend to to go rogue once they lose both parents unless they find their mate. So I'm the black sheep because deep inside they're weary of me, sitting and waiting for any signs of my wolf to go rogue.

So I always been alone, nobody talks to me. They act as if I don't exist; Alpha Trent would only talk to me during dinner, small conversations, asking me how's school then go back to talking to his two sons.

Tonight he admitted to me that he can't talk to me without thinking of his mate, apparently, I have her personality, not a shocker I mean she raised me. He said can't look at me without feeling guilty about the deaths of my parents.

I understand.
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Journal 2/3/14 (1:52 am):

I decided to go on a run that night, the night of my birthday, my wolf was restless. The alpha's had their meetings and his sons thought it'll be a good idea to throw a party. I got up and changed to go to the woods, the house was in the first floor with drunk teenage wolf. I made my way through the crowd and walked around Aaron that was groping Samantha while her boyfriend was somewhere else, when the front doors slammed open.

It took everyone by surprise and the music soon cut off. Alpha Trent was furious and ordered everyone to clean up and meet him in the front yard in 10 minutes.

When he walked out chaos broke out and they all ran around cleaning the house. I quietly stepped outside through the back door and walked towards the forest. A few minutes past before I could smell a strong scent of bay rum mixed with earthy wood and cinnamon.

I didn't know where the smell was coming from but it made my wolf jumped around and I subconsciously followed it.

I was so busy trying to follow the smell that I bumped into someone.

"I'm sorr-" I looked up and stared at his grey eyes.

They are the most beautiful eyes I've seen to this day. He was tall, probably 6'4 and his black hair was combed back but small curls still fell on his face. I wanted nothing but to run my fingers through it.

"Mate" my wolf began growling and purring.

I couldn't believe that I've actually met my mate, the tingles on my arms where he held me to stop me from falling confirmed it.

But just as quick as the excitement came, it diminished when he walked away.

I never saw him again.