Loving You Is Difficult ✔

Chapter 30

"What the hell are you doing here? Did you miss your way? Are you looking for your next target? I think you should check the next door" I said,trying not to sound hurt because I really was and seeing his face was making it worse.

"I came here to talk. I'm really sorry Amy. It's just that you were starving me of sex and I couldn't hold it anymore" he said,sounding remorse.

Is he really being serious right now? That was the best he could come up with.

"Are you trying to justify your actions because you sounded really silly right now." I said.

"No,I'm not. That's exactly why I did what I did." He said, coming closer to me.

"I don't care. Just leave and never show your face here again" I said,opening the door and closing it back immediately.

Sliding down the door,I cried so bitterly. It was very difficult for me to tell him never to show his face again. I didnt even know when I said it. He had become a part of me and it's like I was taking out one of my kidneys. I need to talk to someone. I haven't talked with Mya and Lauren in a while. I can't stay here alone. I need company.

Calling Mya...........ringing but no response.

That's strange because she always answers the phone. Maybe she is sleeping. Silly me. I didn't even know that it's 10pm. How could I expect everyone to be awake like I am? Let me try my luck with Lauren. I pray she answers.

Calling Lauren.............ringing but no response.

I guess I'm all alone.

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I didn't know when I slept off. I guess my eyes couldnt take it anymore. My eyes are seriously paining me. This is what I get for crying about a guy that didn't care about me. A guy that I trusted. A guy I loved. A guy I can't get over with. A guy i thought was my perfect match.

The vibration of my phone indicating a message interrupted my thoughts. A message from Jack. He doesn't quit,does he? 

Good morning Amy. I'm really sorry. If you think i don't love you,then you're wrong. I really do love you. It wasn't my intention to make you sad. I just couldn't control my emotions. Please forgive me. I know that there's still a space in your heart left for me. I'm deeply sorry. I don't know how I could make it up to you.

Reading this brought new tears into my eyes. The one that I couldn't control or should I say,the one I didn't want to control. If he really loved me,why would he do what he did? There is nothing that he would tell me that would make me see reasons with him. He cheated on me and that's it.

But he was right when he said there's still a space left for him in my heart. I really wanted to forgive him but if I had done something like this, I'm very sure that he wouldn't want to hear what I had to say. I don't think there's going to be any way he could make up for what he did. The deed has already being done. Crying won't solve anything. I need to be strong.

There was another message and it was from Lauren.

Hey babe, I saw your missed call. Sorry I couldnt pick. Amy and I would be coming over to your house later. Love you.

So that settles it. I would have to tell them what happened. ,no matter how hard I try to put on a smiling face,they would still know that something is wrong with me because my face is really swollen and my eyes have gone inside. I hate myself for crying. I'm a strong woman. I'm not meant to be crying for an ordinary man.

Is he ordinary? Is he really ordinary Amy?

What am I saying? He's not ordinary. He is Jack. The supposed love of my life. The only man I've genuinely loved. I need to stop brooding. I need to do something. He might not even be thinking about me. He might be thinking of how to get into someone else's underwear. Why am I killing myself? This is not the Amy that I know.

Im literally crying right now 😭😭😭😭. I wish I could be strong like Amy😖😖😖.

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