Well kids in this generation this is how we express our love, through letters that have feelings and not with just one text and their yours!!!
A letter to a first love
Your going to settle down and I am truly happy for you because you are with the person that you love. It took me 14 years to have the courage to put in writing the feelings I have for you. YOU were my first crush and first love. It’s funny because at that time I didn’t know what crush or love meant, all I know is when I met you I felt happy and inspired. It wasn’t love at first sight with you, we were seatmates for so long and we never talked because I was a very shy person.
Days passed and we got to talk you borrowed some of my school supplies, papers and sometimes even answers, but I guess it wouldnt be called borrowing but to tell you the truth I never regretted helping you in class. I also remember that I was the person who called you back to your seat when the teacher arrived. We were never close and I wasn’t the kind of person who would fit in your circle of friends. But school days passed and you didn’t make me feel that way.
I started liking you and then one day you didn’t come to school which was unusual because you and I never missed a class. I felt sad that day like something was missing. I didn’t feel like going down to the cafeteria so my friends and I stayed inside the classroom and I was staring at the attendance board and only your name was up there. I decided I wanted to give a name to this feeling I have for you or somehow label it, and say it out loud or at least to my friends. So I told my friends that the name on this attendance board was my crush, not love just crush.
The next day you came in with a new hair style which shocked the whole class because they never expected you to cut your hair so short because they were so used to your long hair which the school prefect never agreed on but it was a hit with the girls in our school, everyone reacted negatively except me, I think it looked great on you.
Somehow there is a difference between now and before I admitted to myself and a few people that I like you, and that is I am conscious when you’re beside me and my friends react all the time. I started to study more diligently because I wanted to help you study too, and I would get the chance to talk to you.
So many things have happened back then, things that I would look back and smile about and it was you who made them all happen and I am thankful for you because you gave me a high school life worth remembering. Every day after that I fell more in love with you until now were grownups with jobs. Thinking about you makes me feel young again and in love.
My friends now and in the past always ask me why it was you and my lips go blank because there are so many things and reasons why I fell in love with you. You were that person who had a circle of friends but you never made me feel like I didn’t belong. Everyone thought of you as the snob and bad boy and that you got kicked out from an exclusive boys school because of your behaviour but it wasn’t true because you were very kind and friendly. Girls who were snobs and mean liked you but you liked girls who were kind. If ever you were in a fight, it was because of some bully. I also loved the way you are close to your family, your sister and mom. And especially how you reacted when you heard that I liked you.
It was an accident, I never intended for you to know that, I was content back then with just seeing you every day. I never wanted you to know how I felt. But destiny has a way of getting through. I never forgot that day, we didn’t have a teacher then when our classmates started to play the dreaded truth or dare game, I didn’t join because I had a secret I didn’t want anyone to know about. But I was wrong, when it was my one of my friends turn she chose truth and they asked her who she knew had a crush on someone in the room. I think I was reading or something, she said my name and my heart stopped, I knew whose name was next and I fell into shock. She pointed to you. She told everyone I had a crush on you, our classmates laughed and teased, I couldn’t contain my feelings so I ran outside the room to the nearest restroom and I cried. I was so embarrassed I didn’t want to come out. Until my other friends came and got me. That was also the same day that my friend and I fell apart.
After I got out of the restroom I didn’t know how to react or what to do when I sat next to you but you never made me feel embarrassed. You talked to me and you told me you were flattered that I had a crush on you and that made me fall in love with you more. After you told me that, I didn’t feel scared or embarrassed in class anymore because you told me that it was going to be alright. So after all the years have passed and I have met a few men, I will never forget you or un-love you because you were my first love and I haven’t met the guy who has made me feel safe in a world of chaos. I will always love you. Thank you for all the happiest memories in that school year. It was jammed pack with great, happy, embarrassing and fun moments. And now that you’re going to settle down I pray for all the happiness in your life and your family. I’m hoping that maybe in another life it was me who was with YOU.
P.S
to DESTINY, if ever this letter finds its way to him, I hope that he knows that I will always love him .
