Do I Deserve You?

The past, The pain

Hey guys so I made this new story I hope you guys will enjoy it and yes I do ship hookfang human/dragon with snotlout. Anyway enjoy.
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The past

Snotlout POV
I walked through town and it started to rain I was thinking about going home but a sudden sobbing sound stopped me in my tracks. I look to the direction of the stream that passes by the town hall I saw my cousin hiccup curled up and hugging his knees I felt kinda bad. I looked around for my dad. Good he isn't here okay let's go to hiccup. I went to the curled up small figure. I sat right next to him I notice hiccup shifted away from me being so close I didn't mind at all since most vicking like to be alone.i built up the courage to ask him what made so sad and what or who made him cry.

"Hey hiccup what happened? why are you crying?"

"Well snotlout a bunch of older kids came and...... they told me I was ...... weak and was a buden to this village and also saying I'll never be a good cheif like my dad....." *sniffs*

"Why listen to them?"I smiled down at him to prove my point he looked at me with a confused face i groaned. "Oh come on hiccup you need to let that go you have a bright future you are strong and you aren't a burden you'll make a great cheif and I'll be the best vicking ever so I can help you let's make those guys eat there words!"

" You really think we can snotlout what if. I fail and disappointed them"

"That's the thing hiccup vickings learn the hard way we work through the trouble and we do better next time. So what do you say are we gonna be the best."

"Yea thank you snotlout!"

"No problem now let's get you back I'm sure stoick is worried about you!"

The present

Snotlout POV
I looked at my window and sighed that year was a good year and most of those years were but that memory is the one that won't leave. We wee six at the time and that year we both were closest to each other that was until four years after that I lost my mother to a dragon, and my dad blamed me for her death, I don't mind being blamed it was my fault I just watched her battle a dragon with a axe in her hand and me I hide under the bed. The thing I remembered was the bright light and my mother's scream. And that year was horrible that's when the scars started to appear and the pain and the rememinder that I'm a worthless piece of trash. I deserve pain. I came back to my senses when hiccup told me it was my turn for night duty. I yawned and said okay to so I went out of my hut and headed for the hill where the watch tower was. I was about to call hookfang but I stopped. He doesn't need a worthless human bothering him. I just turned the corner and walked up that hill. It was night time already and you can hear the crikets and some dragons snoreing peacefully. I got to the watchtower and headed up those steps and sat in the chair. I looked down to the edge were our base is located. I smiled as I saw the twins trying to catch tuffnuts chicken and I looked to fish legs hut were he was so excited about something he was jumping up and down and fish legs started to run towards hiccup. He probably found something new. I looked else where and it was queit until a cold brezzy brush across my body I shivered. I should have brought a- no no I can handle the cold but its cold up here... Your worthless and weak why are you even still here you can't even handle the cold like a vicking.... My father's voice rang in my head I tried to stay clear from that memory but it just keep coming... I know I'm worthless but I try so hard to please you and everyone I'm just a dissapointed. I don't deserve comfort, peace, happiness, calmness, and love. I deserve pain, sadness, hurt, depression, I'm am the cause of everything I am nothing special I'm just a one who deserves all the pain in the world I'm nothing.... you better believe it your nothing in this world GROW UP AND BE A VICKING!!!!! the memory was strong and I felt sweat come down my fave. I started to breath faster my throat feels like it's closing up I can't stop the memory it's too strong. *Whip* I screamed as the memory took over I hear the whip and even though it's just a memory I can still feel the pain from it the scars I have started to burn and it hurts. I tried to curl up and get away from his voice I tried to think about something else but it wasnt happening. I felt water come down my face I looked up and reach my hand to my cheek the water was tears. No a vicking shouldn't shed tears I guess dad was right I am worthless I'm nothing I need the pain. I sobbed into my knees until I heard someone approaching the watchtower I jolted and tried to wipe the tears away quickly as I can. I tried to compose my self but it wasn't working the tears kept falling I couldn't stop them. Great who ever that is gonna think I'm weak. I looked back down to my knees and I heard a croon from a dragon. I was shocked at first when I looked up I saw hookfang with a bored expression that was until he actually saw my face. I watched as his expression turned to a worried one. I just looked at him the tears still didn't stop and my breathing still wasn't normal.