Why I'm Not Here

Many Reasons

Many reasons go into this. If you read one of my stories about jack and mark, then you know why I'm writing this one.

I'm writing to all of you, with a heavy heart.

My soul, being dragged into the dark pit I call a body, is fading.

My life, non existent.

You all may not know, but last year, my one and only dream came true. My crush Alex and I started dating. It was the best thing to ever happen to me. But as months went by, he grew away from me, and by the 8th month, he ended it. After that my life became shit. My depression is at the highest its ever been. Because im still finishing school, i see him everyday now. We still talk and hang out, but he acts like nothing happened.

About every few months, I get the courage to talk about it with him. The reason why he broke up.

But he now sends me mixed signals. He says he wants to get back together, but then he doesnt. Its really shitty of him to play with my emotions like that, and because of him, i want to curl up in a ball and cry my heart out. Everyday...

Because I still am dealing with this, im most likely not going to update for a really long time again. And im so sorry about it. I feel like a complete ass when i say it, but its true.

I really want to update and make all of you happy, but i cant, i dont have it in me.

Im sorry, im so so sorry....