Real Family

Sleep isn't Always Good

My skins boiling, heating up like my blood is a boiled toxin and my body is the cauldron. Sweat is dripping down my body and I'm overwhelmed by my dark surroundings. A ringing in my ears starts to gradually grow to burn, merging with a primal scream that overflows my senses. The sound is urgent, desperate, a scream that only a young child could make. A scream of terror, of absolute fear, a scream that spoke 'help me' in bold letters that nobody cared to read. It doesn't take long for me to realize that the scream is one of my own, from my past. Images are bouncing around my sight, the banging on my door, the crying 10-year-old who hides under her bed. The shattering glass and blood dripping down my arm. I fall to my knees, covering my ears as if it could stop the sound. But I know the sound will never truly leave. Its marked into my ears like a tattoo, reminding me of who I am, what I am, and what I did.

My eyes suddenly open, and in front of me is a confused looking Jimin, head tilted to the side. I'm immediately scrambling back to the other side of the couch noticing how close he was.

 "Are you ok?" I want to scream at his question, the pounding of my heart against my ribcage and the way I'm gasping for breath should prove that is not ok. I'm not ok.

"I'm f-fine." I stutter, my voice hoarse and dry. I lick my lips and suddenly I've never craved water so much in my life. Jimin's eyes widen slightly and he's tilting his head as if asking the question with his body language. 

"Are you sure?"

No.

"Yes. I'm fine, sorry, I just had a weird dream." I stuttered, shifting my gaze from Jimin to see everyone packing up, none of the other boys in sight, thank God. "What time is it?" I ask groggily, rubbing at my eyes just as the bright lights of the studio start to blind me. 

"It's a little past four, we were going to get some dinner soon. Are you hungry?" Jimin's voice all of a sudden is so soft as if he could tell what just happened as if he's seeing through my facade. 

I hate it. 

"Yeah, a little bit." I look down at my lap then notice the blanket over me. 

"Namjoon Hyung brought it, you looked so cold and one of the producers had a spare. You can just leave it here someone will grab it." I nodded then gently folded it, placing it on the couch then standing up and following Jimin towards the elevator. There's a slight sway in my step and Jimin seems to notice because suddenly an arm is around my waist stopping me from falling to the ground. "Hey, wow be careful. You just woke up maybe sit down for a moment." I nod, half processing his words and slump in the corner of the large elevator, eyes glazing over as I begin to process the dream. 

"Mia, we're here." Jimin motions towards the open doors of the elevator and I quickly stand up, walking with Jimin towards the back entrance. I don't really know where I'm going, considering this was my first time in the building, and I had only entered from the front entrance. So I decided to stick close to Jimin

"Will there be cameras outside?" I pouted at my own question, not feeling ready for the bright lights and loud screams. He patted my head gently, mumbling something about how he loved that I was shorter than him before clearing his throat. 

"No this leads towards the private parking lot where the boys are." He opens the door, leading to an indoor parking space. The lights giving an ominous glow and the only thought that enters my mind is how someone always dies in indoor lots during horror movies. A black limousine pulls up, the chauffeur is exiting quickly, opening the door for the two of us and I slide in, muttering a thank you. Once in the car, I find Namjoon once again furiously typing on his phone, and a giddy Jungkook practically jumping in his seat. 

"Mia, we were going to get Panda Express, is that ok?" I nod, ignoring Tae who's doing a little dance in his seat mumbling Panda Express. He must really like their food. "What do you want to order?" All of a sudden, a sense of drowsiness overtakes me and food is the last thing on my mind right now. 

"Um, actually I'm not that hungry, I feel really tired." Jin turned towards me in worry, reaching over from his seat gently touching my forehead. But as soon as his fingers are touching my skin I'm flinching back, causing an awkward sound of my head hitting the seat to break the silence.

"Mia, we aren't going to.." Hoseok pauses as if looking for the right words and reality suddenly hits me (No pun intended.) I've been so obvious with the boys, letting them see right thru me, maybe I thought if they saw the real me they'd bring me back. Everyone eventually does. "You're safe with us, we aren't going to hit you." I whimper at his words, and suddenly hate how I'm squished between Namjoon and Jimin, and how all of the attention was on me. I bite my lip so hard to keep tears from overflowing that the metallic taste of blood soon fills my mouth. I pray that the physical pain will somehow even out the emotional. Jungkook clears his throat, and I turn towards him. Both of his hands are behind his back and his giddy smile has morphed into a sad smile. 

"This probably isn't the best time, but we got you something." He reveals a box from behind his back, with the words Apple iPhone XR on the side, and a red bow taped to the top. "You said you didn't have a phone so I thought we should get you one. You'll need it to communicate with us anyways." I looked back in forth between Tae and Jungkook, and suddenly tears are welling up in eyes from pure happiness rather then dread. No one had ever done anything this nice for me before. 

"I've never owned a phone before. Are you guys sure? It looks expensive." It comes out automatically and I don't miss the proud smiles gracing both their features. 

"Of course we're sure. It was my idea," Tae unnecessarily adds in, causing Jungkook to give him a glare. 

"Seriously Tae," he turns back to me, "I bought the bow." Jin suddenly surges forward in his seat, 

"Hey! Who was the one who spent their money to buy her the phone? And who was the one that stopped Tae from accidentally buying her a Hello Kitty Phone? Me! But did I take the credit? No!" Before the fight can escalate I start laughing, not just the chuckle from before but seriously laughing. I wipe my imaginary tears from my face looking at basically all of the boys. (except Yoongi who sneered at me but even his bad attitude wouldn't falter what I was about to say) 

"Thank you so much." I put as much genuity as I can into the four words, not necessarily thanking them for the phone, but for the memories that they've given me. They seemed to actually like me, how long would it take before that changed.