Can you survive?

Prologue: My Story

Hello, my name is Bethany Gilberts. I have black hair, blue eyes, and pink rosy lips. I love the world and the exsistance of things that i still can't seem to comprehend. I am not afraid to help a stranger and I don't just gravitate towards people around me. Everything is supper mysterious and im still trying to figure out if i like that. People used to call me Beth but really anything is fine. I am 18 years old and I haven't had any real family since I was 14. The reason I am telling you this is because you should know what you are getting yourself into before you read about my crazy existence. Take this as a warning.

So lets start when my mom died of unknown causes. I was 7 years old at the time. They had no idea how she died but all i can really remember is finding her dead pale body. We had went camping right next to a river bank and she said she was going down to the water. Being a child, I just continued wandering around the forest but going to sit with her every so often. The last time I went she was face down in the water. The only reason she was by camp was because the black shirt she was waring over her swim suit. It had hooked on the log near the entry spot. I ran to my dad with a numb feealing in my limbs. He quickly scooped her up out of the water and rushed her to the car. We drove to the nearest hospital but I felt dread like going wouldn't mean anything. About half an hour later she was pronounced dead. They originaly thought she had drown but after an autopsy they discovered she had died well before water could even reach her lungs. Me and my father were in shock. The questions swirling in my mind kept coming to "why would this happen to us" or "what killed her"?

After all that we packed up our stuff struggling to get everything in the car as we stayed deathly quiet. Arriving home we had the funeral, everyone mourning over her beautiful life she had lived while i just stood looking at her ghostly white skin in a mahogany coffin. It was horrible not being able to run in my parents room at night because the nightmares telling me she was dead were now all to true. I couldn't run in their room anymore anyways because every night dad would stay up, drinking mom's wine and staring out the window. After everything had happened I started to have dreams. They weren't always nightmares but they were weird and upsetting. Mom was in them, telling me it wasn't safe for me anymore. That there were things I would soon run into that were evil. Her death wasn't an accident and that there is a world full of things that could only appear in story books. She warned me saying that me and my father where in danger and needed to protect ourselves. Then she would just evaperate into thin air leaving me in complete darkness. I would wake up with my hands clutching my blankets, a cold sweat running down my back. My window would always be open. ALWAYS. No matter if i locked it or put something against it. This all stopped when i turned 10 and it almost felt like I was abandoned. That the dreams of her at least kept us connected somehow.

My dad died when I was 14. Soon after mom died he would just go to his room and lock the door. He wrote to her sometimes telling her how much he missed her; that he couldn't believe she was gone and how he didn't think he could do this anymore. He wrote how the days would drag on and that even though he loved me he didn't believe that he could give me the life i diserved. But he also couldn't live without either of us so he did what he thought would be the best. I was dealing with my feelings of abandonment and I wasn't able to help him which i used to chastise myslef about but as I've grown, I've learned there was nothng I could have done because i was simply a child. I couldn't have taken on that responseability even if i wanted to. He went to work, ate his meals, and sat in that room all by himself till he finally did it. Its sad to think of the last years i had with him because we never really talked.

The day he died it was like any other day. I had went to go get him because i made lunch. I was hoping he would eat more today but i guess he didn't plan to. I knocked on the door but an asnwer never came and it as ereily quiet. I had this pit in my stomach, Like when i found mom but a lot more sickly. like i was going to throw up but what would come up would be a slimy black goo. I rushed into the room and looked around till my eyes landed on the closet and my legs gave out from under me. My poor father hanging by his neck in their closet while all the slothes had been taken out and layed on the bed. His face looked almost at ease, as if he was happy in death and that ripped at my heart even more at the tears burned my eyes. My face becoming hot as i hiccuped and sobbed lightly.

Finally turning away from him i grabbed my phone and called 911. The operater quickly pinned my phone because i was having to much trouble getting out our address. She tried despretly to sooth me but nothing worked as i chocked into the phone. they got ther soon enough but we all knew he was dead. they cut him down and rushed me outside. I sat in a cop car and when they pulled my fathers body out in a body bag i shunned to the other side. my heart hurt and i just couldn't cry anymore. I had a pounding headache and my eyes burned from exhaustion. I was taken form my home that day to never go back and to never take any of my things or at least a picture. My mind rippled like a lake that had just had a rock thrown into. What was going to happen now?

I went into foster care and was taken by a family with two biological children. One was a girl, age 16 and her name was Silvy. The other was a boy age 18. They called him JJ but i still have no idea what his real name was. I was there for barely a month and the kids weren't to interested in me but their dad had plans. Disgusting plans. The night i left he pushed me in my room and onto my desk. I started to try and get away but he twisted my arm while grabbing my inner thigh. I stilled and tried to understand what was going to happen. When he ripped my sharts down I began to scream for help as sobbs slipped out inbetween each breath. My body shaking in fear. I heard running coming from the stairs as he touched my chest through my shirt when suddenly the door slammed open reveiling JJ and Silvy. As JJ moved forward toward me his father shoved me to the floor. As he walked towards his son he undid his belt. He ripped it from his pants loops and hit JJ hard across the face with the belt buckle. Stumbling back he looked up at his father while holding his bleeding face. Their dad screamed to leave and do nothing or they would would get worse than a belt buckle.

Silvy looked between her brother and father till her eyes finally settled on my. I was shivering as i covered myself with my hands. She me a sad look before running down the hall and a door slammed. Tears streaming down my face i looked up to JJ who was now bleeding down his neck. His eyes trailed me up and down with a look af horror as his dad stepped infront of me. I started to try and get up and possibly flee but when i got to my feet JJ had turned and was stomping his way down the stairs till i couldn't hear him anymore. Their nasty father then calmly closed the door and turned to eye me with  a lustful gaze that made my body rack with shivers of disgust. He had his way with me as i wailed and thrashed to try and free myself. Nothing worked.

Right after i cleaned myself up in the shower and packed a backpack. I left as soon as i knew he was asleep and as i walked to the stairs their mom walked out into the hallway. She gave me a look of disgust wich only made me turn and run down the stairs. I made money by singing in random parks and slowly hich hicked my way to California. Soon enough I found a job working fast food wich led me to getting my GED as well as a shitty apartment.

I never gave up singing at parks though because in this crazy way it helped me cope with my problems. After worki would grab my suff and go to which ever park i felt like that day and would set up. I ended up listenng to the radio one day and decided to call in because i was honestly thinking nothing of it. I ended up winning and the feelings that went through my was something i really havent felt before. Like everything was turning on an axis. I was excited and very hopeful for what was to come for the first time in forever. A $1000 check and a first class ticket for a round trip cruise came in the mail which led to me finally using my PTO. I was still feeling depressed sure but this trip made me feel like something big was gonna happen and that it would push me in the right direction. I just had to find out but it was the biggest decision of my life. Many things happened on that cruise so I shall tell the story in full because why the hell not. Some things i can't even believe actually happened but you be the judge. Will you believe me or am i just making it all up?