Eyes of Fire

Donkey's Arse

  It was a solemn funeral for Sigurd as he was in a boat adorned with furs and surrounded by his weapons. Everyone was giving Ivar dirty looks as he was looking at his dead brother with silent tears. Ivar's anger had gotten the better of him yet again, and his eyes were filled with regret, guilt, and sorrow. He could not take back what he had done no matter what he tried- he had killed his own brother.

~

  "I am truly sorry." I heard Ivar saying as I leaned into the tent he was talking to his brothers in. They looked at me as I glanced only at the youngest brother.

  "If you are done here, Ivar, I'd like you to come with me." I said softly, and Ivar grabbed his helmet before climbing down from his chair and crawling out of the tent.

  "What do you want, Hel?"

  "Why does it seem as if I know you better than your own brothers?" I questioned while walking away from the mass of tents.

  "Ever think it's because you do? Why are you asking this?"

  "Because I know you didn't mean to do it." I glanced down at the man and saw him looking at me. "You have a beast in you, Ivar, and you have yet learned to control it. You get angered and you lose your senses. I understand that." Turning my gaze back to the land ahead of me, I stopped walking. "I know what it's like to be so isolated because of how you are and to be blinded by anger. Ivar, what you did was wrong, there's no fixing that and there are no excuses. However, I will not hold it against you." I knelt down and put my hand on his shoulder. "Your own guilt is enough punishment." Ivar may act like a man full of pride, but he was more critical of himself than anyone else around.

  We were both quiet while simply looking over the landscape, listening to the birds and bugs. Bringing him out here was both a move to get him away from all of the hateful stares and a way to let him think. The mind was a powerful thing- Ivar's incredibly so- in both knowledge and inner torment.

~

  I jolted awake in the middle of the night, grabbing my knife on a reflex as I heard movement in my tent.

  "Hel...." I heard sniffling, and my eyes took a second to adjust to the dark.

  "Ivar?" I furrowed my brows, rubbing my eyes with the butts of my palms after dropping my knife. "What is it?"

  "I'm so alone." Looking at Ivar as he sat next to my pallet, tears were streaking down his cheeks. "Floki is leaving, and without him, I'm...." He trailed off, and I sat up.

  "Did you have a nightmare, Ivar? What are you talking about?"

  "He's building a boat, Hel. He's leaving now that Helga's gone. He said we didn't need him anymore and that he was letting the gods carve his path." The blue-eyed man explained while sniffling, and I had the urge to run out of the tent to go and see if this was true, but I didn't have to because of the state Ivar was in.

  "Ivar, you're not alone." I placed my hand on his upper back. "Garmr and I are still here for you."

  "A wolf and a freakish woman." He scoffed.

  "Don't be mean." I popped him upside the head before scooting over and sighing. "Come here."

  "What?"

  "You heard me. Come here." I pat the now empty space on the pallet while looking at him. "Don't give me that look, I'd do the same if you were a woman. I'm not going to kick a friend in need out of my tent, but I am very tired and it's late." Ivar seemed hesitant before wiping his face and crawling under the blanket of furs I had. Clicking my tongue, I called Garmr, and the large wolf plopped down right between us, nuzzling the blue-eyed man and licking his tears away.