Balloons

"Are you sure, tadwinks?" Sera asked, whispering to the chubby mage holed up in the small area outside Cullen's office. "You're pretty goody-goody."

"Me?" Kiora laughed a little, lighting a hand up with dark purple magic. Sera instinctively tried to back away, but they were in pretty close quarters. "No, I'm just usually a little to lazy to do anything bad. That makes people think I follow the rules."

"Good point," Sera said back, nodding. "If you can't be bothered to break the rules, people think you want to follow 'em. Clever." Kiora smiled wide as she swirled a finger over her palm, making the purple flames churn like a fiery little whirlpool. "What's your plan then, your mighty Inquisitor-ness?"

Kiora had actually been the one to suggest a prank this time. Usually, she just sat back and waited for Sera to come running into her lap to play the sleepy-eyed, innocent, but she's been here the while time! card. Sera was excited and nervous that Kiora wanted to pull off her own little joke. Especially since it involved magic. Sure, Sera loved Kiora—and loved her a lot, too—but magic was just so... freaky. It was unpredictable and unnatural, but if it made Kiora happy, Sera would put up with it.

"Okay, so, see here?" She asked, gesturing to the center of the swirling flames. Inside was a weird, shimmery, mirror-like area, that after a closer look, turned out to be a window of sorts into Cullen's office.

"Is that a portal?" Sera asked, transfixed. "Like one'a those freaky elf-y mirrors?"

"Sort of," Kiora said, "but it's just a looking glass. Gives me a view into a room I planted magic in beforehand."

"You snuck into Commander Stuffy-Pant's office earlier?" Sera asked, impressed. "Why didn't you invite me?" She was a little miffed.

"I've had magic planted in every room for ages now," she said, shrugging. "Every room I go into I leave a little trail, so I can tap into my pathways if I walk them enough."

"Like a little snail," Sera whispered in awe, looking into the freaky magic flames. Kiora giggled, nodding. "Right cool."

She watched Kiora dip a long, glossy black fingernail into the magic window, moving the picture to show Cullen asleep in his bed. It was just past midnight. He must've passed out a few minutes ago. He still had his boots on. "So. Plan," she said, looking up at Sera, her sleepy eyes sparkling. "I use a sleeping spell, you know, to keep him out. Templars are pretty sensitive to magic so we've got to be careful at first."

"At first?" Sera raised an eyebrow.

"My sleeping spells are very good."

"Yeah, good point."

"I need you to cover me while I sneak in," she said, seeming to be as giddy as one could with her eyes always half-lidded and her voice sleepy. "And then... balloons."

"Balloons?" Sera tried to keep her laughter quiet. "You gonna fill his office with balloons?"  Kiora nodded, smiling. "Magic balloons?" Kiora looked utterly giddy. "You're mad," Sera grinned, shaking her head. "And Maker, I love it!"

"You do?"

"Yeah!"

"Your approval means everything," Kiora giggled. "The queen of practical jokes approved my silly little prank..!" She seemed to be swooning. "Okay!" She shut her hand like a pocket mirror, snuffing out the purple flames. "Cover me, sunshine."

"You got it, tadwinks," Sera nodded, mocking seriousness. She wasn't all too worried about Kiora getting in trouble. After all, her dumb, sleepy self was the boss, after all. Every fancy-pants member of the Inquisition had to go through her, so they couldn't exactly spend their precious, busy time being mad at her over a joke.

She watched Kiora sneak up to the door to Cullen's office, her motions surprisingly graceful for someone who certainly wasn't a rogue. She moved like a shadow, her black robes certainly helping in concealing her larger figure. She sunk down, and a dark purple mist slowly escaped from the tips of her needle-pointed fingers, running under Cullen's door. She summoned that purple mirror again, and Sera watched, transfixed, as she made sure the Commander was asleep before giving Sera a thumbs up and an adorable, dopey grin. She slowly pushed open the door to Cullen's room, and snuck in like a cat. Thankfully, she had more grace than her fat cat, Socks, who usually announced his presence with loud thumps everywhere he went.

She watched through the opening of the door, her eyebrows pushing together as she watched Kiora summon a weird, purple-ish-black ball of magic, and set it on the ground. Then she backed away a little, like that was all she was doing. She squatted down, and tapped it twice with the pad of her finger, watching it glow a little before turning on her heal and running out as fast as she could without tripping over her robe. She looked very pleased with herself.

"Just one?" Sera asked, confused as Kiora grabbed her hand and pulled her along back to her fancy Inquisitor chambers.

"For now!" Kiora whispered, laughter in her voice.

Okay, maybe Sera didn't trust magic all the way, but it was for sure exciting.

When they got to Kiora's room, she plopped herself onto the bed, her chest moving quickly as she tried to catch her breath. She got winded quite easily.

"So, what's with the one balloon?" Sera asked, jumping up onto the bed next to her.

Kiora smiled and fell back onto her back, sinking slightly into the squishy mattress. "It's a surprise!" She was positively delighted. Sera couldn't help but wonder if her joy in pranking Cullen was a little bit about his being a Templar and her being a mage. Sera wouldn't ask.

Kiora wiggled her way out of her robe, encouraging Sera to strip to her undergarments as well. They both got under Kiora's mass of covers, snuggling close.

"I think you'll be happy," Kiora whispered, nuzzling her cute, big-ish human nose against Sera's flat elven one.

"Me too." Sera eagerly awaited whatever madness Kiora decided to unleash on the unwitting Templar. Sure, Kiora was pretty passive, but those looks in her eyes were telling enough. She planned a clusterfuck of nonsense and Sera was already so proud of her.

• • ♡ • •

Twas a clusterfuck indeed.

Kiora and Sera strolled downstairs, hand in hand, Kiora dressed in her most casual robes and smoking an elfroot cigar.

"For the love of the Maker!" They picked up the pace a little.

Purple-ish black balloons were spilling out of Cullen's office, and what seemed like the entirety of Skyhold had come to watch the War Commander burst out of his balloon-filled room, unstyled hair sticking up every which way from the magic. Sera couldn't help but burst out laughing, and she heard Kiora start giggling.

"Nice look, Curly!" Varric called out, trying to contain his laughter. He shot Sera and Kiora a glace that was clearly appreciative of the job they did.

"Sera!" Cullen fixated on Sera, who just smiled and waved with her free hand. "I hope you realize we have rules and punishments here!" 

"Not if you don't catch me!" She laughed, tightening her grip on Kiora's hand. The mage just burnt the end of her cigar in her hand, sprinting away with Sera to the sounds of the no-fun-allowed Commander yelling at her to get back there and clean up the mess she allegedly created.

Kiora was laughing alongside her, obviously having a great time. Sera was going to have to let her plan pranks more often.