Be my boyfriend

Chapter 1 lost and lonely

The search all began in grade 11 ... I really have never considered myself to be pretty or even decent for that matter but I knew that I wanted someone to think I was. Someone to just acknowledge my existence. I thought I was meaningful to someone even if they just touched me in a certain way. I soon found out that i meant nothing to them, that the whole concept of "your pretty" really was just a slur of words to them... As long as they were getting what they wanted they'd say everything and anything to manipulate me. Am I guilty in this of course? I wasn't thinking.. I needed the affection I wanted to believe there was something there that I was wanted for more then sexual purposes.

Story one:

Me and one of my closest friends were at the mall.. Bored out of our minds and wanting to meet new people. She had gotten a text from a guy she had recently been talking to who wanted to meet up and "hang" with her. Her feeling quite comfortable since he was a fellow classmate of hers took it upon herself to make plans and we finally had something interesting to do. At first I was hesitant because I didn't know him and didn't want to be a third wheel. My mind had changed when my friend told me that this so called guy had an extremely cute friend that was gonna be there along with another friend. Me being oblivious agreed and that's when it was started... When I became addicted with wanting affection.

The journey had just began for us little did we know we were going to create some long lasting regrets.

As we arrived to this guys apartment the neighbourhoods surrounding gave me huge nots in my stomach. I already knew that it was a bad idea.. But I wanted to enjoy life.. I just wanted to have fun. Once we reached front of the apartment things became more real. The buzzer was pressed and before I knew it we were in the elevator going to the 9th floor. The elevator reeked of old cigars and sweat which made me wonder how this visit would go. Previously when at the mall my friend had talked to the guy on the phone and also his cute friend and had pretended to be me telling him all of the dirty things I was gonna do to him.. Sucking his dick that is. I was a little distort I mean I guess I wanted experience and all but I didn't know these guys at all.. The elevator doors opened and we walked down the long narrow hallway. We heard a noise from behind us and turned to see the guy she was meeting... He was standing right behind one of the opened doors and motioned his hands towards us greeting us as we walked in. The apartment was small and was very old.. So it looked the part. I looked around with confusion... Where was the cute guy? The one my friend had said was gonna be there. The guys that were there were no where close to be being cute.. Had she just tricked me to come so she wouldn't be alone? I glared at her. "You better not leave me" I said whispering in her ear. In a matter of minutes though she had preceded to the bedroom and I was left with awkward silence sitting down on the chair as his two friends watched basketball.. The apparent "cute" friend leaned towards me "what happened to the outgoing girl on the phone?". "Oh um I mean your with your friend I just don't wanna get too crazy" his friend laughed "oh no u can get crazy don't worry I'll watch". The "cute" friend got up and walked towards me he grabbed my hand and told me to follow him. I wasn't too sure what he was going to do.. I was so scared I mean the farthest I had gone with a guy at that time was makingout.. He ended up taking me to his washroom..

He sat me down on the toilet lid, and turned off the light. The room was pitch black and my heart was racing with fear. I felt something rubbing up against my face and before I knew it his dick was in my mouth. Should I have left when I saw the situation? Probably.. Why didn't i? The taste was disgusting.. And it was difficult to breath.. This was how it felt? My first time sucking dick..