The Tale of Pirates (Might change that title)

The Tale of Captain Tendance Von Gorm Chapter 1

Dear reader, 

I am writing these messages in hopes someone will know my story about my travels with the oddest man I've ever met, John Roger, who also is the seemly most fearless and jolly pirate I've seen; nothing seemed to faze him, even with a sword pointed at him, he'd just laugh with that loud laugh of joy of his. But, that's not who I'm here to talk about yet. I'm talking about my boyfriend, Sharon Vonce Parker. 

Well, here's how it started. I was looking for some crew members to help me sail the seas in search of treasures and loot some poor ship that would cross The Strong Arms; the finest and strongest ship I could find. Well, my first recruit was oddly enough Captain John after I boarded his ship and ransacked it. He didn't give up without a fight, but I must admit, he seemed to enjoy it; even as I was about to slice his ear off, he woud just laughed merrily. Heh. I must admit that's why I like him and he can get drunk the quickest of any man I've seen and still be laughing his ass off. 

Though I didn't think he would mind.... I didn't tell him and John's crew; or whats left of them 'cause the rest sailed away in the safety boats like the lil cowards they are, that I was a homosexual. I didn't think they would like a captain who was into men; especially the seroius looking one who calls himself Sharp. Sharp seemed to have hated me the moment we meet and I didn't understand why, but John said,"He's just sore that someone was able to best him at fighting and he hasn't seen his girl in a longtime. He sails the seas with me, so we can hopefully get rich. Even I tell him though that I just get lucky with these treasure hunts, and stick to capturing the ships. Besides, it's more fun then digging for hours.". 

Hmm. I kinda understand. But I never had a real lover before, and every wince I tired would just try to betray me. Think they can double-cross me, Captain Tendance Von Gorm, do they? Well, I'll let your imagination figure out what I did to those betray me. Anyway, we went to this bar looking for crew-members, when I saw this very pretty lass serving drinks and I thought that I should try and show that I was a tough straight man; though I didn't really feel comfortable doing it but I needed them and had to get them to trust me. As she turned around I realized it was David; or Sarah Phem Nie as he's known in these parts. 

He's been my eyes and ears in these bars for what feels like months now and his acting skills seem to fool even the most sober man or woman here. I don't know if I should tell the other's about him though; they could try to betray me just like others have tried to. David must have noticed and understood what I was thinking and he whispered,"Hey, keep them around. You're gonna need them to run The Strong Arms and they need to trust you as well. Also, I been hearing rumors of a secret android being made a few miles from here in a--". *BAM* I looked around and sure enough there was John drinking his ass off. 

I sighed, and as I watched John clinging all over Sharp trying to make him sing, I asked David,"What do you think of them, Sarah?", and he said in his very realistic woman voice so he wouldn't get caught,"I think you need a bigger crew, hun."then I looked at him and said,"Where you suggest? You've got to have heard something.". He thought about it and I knew he had to have heard something, but then suddenly I heard a fight happening and I saw Sharp trying to keep someone off of John and I ran to them to stop it. 

I saw John clinging all over some guy while this other guy and Sharp are trying to pull him off. I went to them and tried to get John outta of his drunken state; sometimes I think he's useless with how much drinking he does but I need him. I started shaking him so he would sober up and realize that he had just been robbed. Just as John realized his bag of gold and sword was missing, he ran after those two and I followed quickly and yelled at him,"I told you to stop drinking! Now look what happened!"then he replied as he ran ahead,"Captain, why don't you shut up and get my sword back?"and we did just that but we had to fight those two for them.