smell the roses ↠ y.m

chapter twenty-three

(^^ jimin singing mr removed ^^)

Jimin sang softly, tracing shapes on Yoongi's chest. Yoongi was slowly dozing off. Jimin continued to sing, his eyes shut softly as his tracing turned into him placing his hand under Yoongi's shirt to rub his chest. Yoongi had stopped playing with Jimin's hair. He was completely relaxed. He wanted to cry for god knows why. Maybe it was just stress. But he enjoyed this. He enjoyed Jimin company. He just never wanted him to leave. He never did. Yoongi held onto Jimin's hand on his chest, continuing to let his singing turn into hums.

Jimin looked up to Yoongi. He still didn't know why he got angry instead of crying. But then again he just didn't like crying in front of Yoongi. He thought it made him seem weak. And someone who's weak doesn't deserve to be with Yoongi. At least that's what he thinks.

Yoongi was now fully asleep, Jimin kept singing afterward. He was afraid that if he stopped he would start crying. So tried hard. Really hard. He couldn't cry because there was nothing to cry about. Crying over a small thing of getting yelled at makes no sense.

Jimin's voice cracked and he covered his mouth, slowly and carefully getting away from Yoongi to go to the bathroom. He sat in the corner on the cold floor, his knees to his chest.

"Cry" he told himself. "Cry so you don't have to cry anymore." Jimin profusely started to wipe under his eyes, they were starting to get wet. This was stupid. He had no reason to cry really. But he let it happen. He let it all flow out and he didn't try to stop it. Putting on a tough act was hard. Acting like you didn't care was hard. Accepting the fact that you may be at the bottom of Yoongi's worries was hard.

So he cried it out. He sat there and he let it all out so he wouldn't have to worry about it anymore. He didn't want sadness. He didn't want to be angry anymore. He just let everything out. Everything. His dad, his sick mom, yoongi, and just.. everything. He bit down on his knuckle to stop from making sound, he wouldn't wanna wake up Yoongi to the sight of him breakdown.

Jimin stumbles to get up to wipe his face and rise it. He didn't want Yoongi to see anything. Nothing at all. He was fine. Yeah perfectly fine. He splashed the water on his face, drying it after continuing to splash his face five more times.

Jimin opened the door to meet eyes with Yoongi. He told himself he would break, not in front of Yoongi. His bottom lip quivered before hugging him, shoving his face into Yoongi's chest. Yoongi was a bit taken back but he rubbed Jimin's back.

"What's wrong..

What's on your mind..

What do you want to say.."

Is what Jimin wanted to hear. But it wasn't. He knew Yoongi couldn't read his mind. He had no right to get mad that Yoongi never asked. But instead Yoongi was silent. He chose not to push anymore buttons. Yoongi just rubbed his back, swayed side to side softly, and kiss his head. But deep inside that's what Jimin wanted. He didn't want Yoongi to ask. He wanted to be comforted. Not interrogated. Jimin hadn't realized he fell asleep on Yoongi. He was carried back to the bed. And that was the end of his short breakdown. He hoped it was the last.