House Sitter

The Message

I woke up with the taste of copper in my mouth because sometime in the night I had bitten through my tongue. I lay in the bed for a long time, my heart pounding, sheets soaked with sweat. I had kicked the duvet away and it lay in a heap at the foot of the bed, all tangled into a grey clump. I looked over at the clock: 5:03. Bella should be meowing her way back in the house any minute now, I thought, I'll get up when she gets here.

But fifteen minutes passed and she didn't make a peep. Instead, just before 5:30, I heard a soft jingle jingle jingle coming from the kitchen. I was confused, I was sure I'd let her out last night. I decided to get up and feed her: it was a good excuse to check out the damage I did to my tongue in the night.

As I poured a scoop of dry food into her bowl, I went over the dream from the night before. I remembered it in crystal clear detail: the ballroom; my confident, attractive, better self; the play; Claire drowning. The message was clear: I could have fixed something and I didn't. I'm seeing her tonight and I won't make that mistake again. This is my chance to man up and make things right!

Bella didn't come when the food hit the dish but I paid it no mind. I went into the bathroom to look at my tongue, but the bleeding had stopped and I didn't see any obvious damage. What was I gonna do, anyway? Put a bandaid on it?

I went back into the bedroom to get my phone and text Claire:

I'm free Friday

We never went to that place in Emeryville

Oh yeah! Okay let's do that

Great!

--

Hey! We still on tonight???

The moment I sent the message I realized that it wasn't yet 6am and that I must look like a total psycho. Oh well, too late, I thought, at least now she'll know I'm serious.

Jingle jingle jingle

I went into the kitchen to make sure Bella really had come inside and to interrogate her about how she got in, but the kitchen remained empty. Frowning, I took the bag of treats out of the cupboard and gave it a shake. I whistled as I patrolled the house, shaking the little treat bag as I walked about, but she didn't appear.

I went down to the basement, thinking maybe she got into the compost, but she wasn't there either. The bin was right where I left it: on the floor along with the debris of the collapsed shelf that tore up my nose.

Jingle jingle jingle

I headed back upstairs and tossed the treat bag onto the kitchen counter. I've got to get ready for a date! I thought, smiling for the first time in a week.

-----

The water of the shower was way too hot but I suffered through it. I hadn't realized how tense the muscles of my back and neck had been until I started to feel them melt under the scalding water. The air was heavy in there, thick and wet like the jungle, and I had to work hard to suck in each breath.

"Nice to see you," I say, staring at the floor of the tub.

"Thanks, you look nice." I smile, the hot water pours over the back of my neck.

"Oh, hah, this old thing?"

"I bought you that."

"I know, that's why I wore it."

The air was so heavy in the shower, I was having trouble breathing.

CLAIRE: I wanted to give it back to you