One More Time

People used to advise me, to not dream too high because it will only be hurting when you finally falls down from the high. Despite all the advices and warnings given to me, i still dare to hope and dream high.

You guys might be asking me what's that thing that i'm dreaming so high for others to give me such warnings, well it's better for me to just tell you guys now because sooner or later you all are going to find out about it anyways.

The thing that i hope so high is for my husband to love me back and have a happy life with him. 

I know you all might be wondering about our situation now, well let me tell you about it but before any of that first let me introduce myself. My name is Wayo but you guys can just call me Yo and as you guessed it… yes i’m a guy. Meanwhile my husband's name is Phana but i just call him P'Pha. Yes we both are guys who got married to each other, there's nothing wrong with that .

I have known my husband since high school but at that time P'Pha doesn't know me or my existence. Then we meet again in our college and during that time he finally notice me when i entered a college competition where P'Pha had to be there at all the practise session because he is the previous competition winner.

We both became more closer because my bestfriend Ming started dating one of Pha's best friend P'Kit. You don't know how excited I was when i can see and talk with him and finally think that i had a chance tonne with him.

During my second year of college, my family asked me to engaged with their close friend son. During that time, they already know about me liking men and they accepted me for who I am. At first i feel sad to think that I'm gonna get engaged with a stranger but imagine how surprised and happy I was when I find out that the person that I'm supposed to be engaged with was none other than P'Pha himself. During that time i thought to myself that i gonna live happily with P'Pha but that thoughts were immediately destroyed by how P'Pha react to the news.

You see, P'Pha is a well known player in our college. With his handsome face, tall and muscular body, he can get any women that he wants easily. People keep talking about all the girl and one night stand that he had before. But even with all the rumours i think that P'Pha is the one for me.

When P'Pha know about engagement he went ballistic saying that he still young to get married and also the fact that he is not a f*cking gay. My heart broke with all the degrading word that he thrown at me and told me to never see or talk to him again but before i can do any of those thing, P'Pha parents made him choose either to get engaged with me or get kick out from the house and live on his own.

With the choice that P'Pha have, he choose to get married with me but he told me that he will make me suffer and make our marriage life miserable as much as he can.

Even though with all the threat that P'Pha make, i still hope that maybe one day he will finally accept me and have our happy life together. 

Only our family and fews of our close friend knew about this engagement. At first they were surprised about this news but they still wish the best for us and for our happiness without knowing the truth. In front of his friend, P'Pha will act that he is happy to be with me but behind them he will act cold and sometime will use bad word on me or treat me like someone who doesn't even exists .

Our families decide to plan our wedding after both of us finish with our studies and graduate from the college. His parent also told me to stay with him in his dorm so that we can get know each other better. But instead of sleeping together, P'Pha will usually sleep on the couch or................ sleep with other women.

Yeah, you heard that right, even though we both are already engaged he still goes out and sleeps with other women. You might want to ask me how i know that P'Pha is cheating on me with others. Well with all the hickeys, lipstick stain and the smell of a women cologne on P'Pha shirt, it's already enough evidence for his affairs which he's keeping behind my back.