ship: larry
summary: kinda based off friends by ed sheeran but kinda not cause its poorly written but in which larry grows up and has a falling out only to reunite five years later
word count: 1995
If there was one thing that stuck with Harry Styles in his seven and a half years knowing Louis Tomlinson, it was that they were not friends, nor had they ever been at any point. Along with the fact that he did not think that to be a good thing, the fact that they were never anything more than friends. And God did Harry hate that. Nothing bothered him more than the fact that all these things would happen between them, and they were surely more than friends, at some point at least, but nothing major ever changed. Until, that is, Harry fucked it all up for everyone.
It was ten years ago, though Harry remembers it as if it happened last night. Now, it's natural for people to have regrets, we can't through life without them, but he's almost positive that no one regrets anything more than Harry Styles having a breakdown and screeching to Louis Tomlinson at the very top of his lungs that he was in fact, in love with the boy.
He still sees the look Louis gave him when it happened, and he doesn't blame him for reacting the way he did- Harry yelled that in the middle of their last day in the only class they had together senior year, and he remembers the way that everyone took sides with their stares of pure judgement. The way some of them looked at Harry like he was dumb for even having feelings for Louis, the way some people looked at Louis like he had the coldest heart in the world, and the way they looked at both of them for allowing this to happen in public. But there was this one stare, it haunts him every night mainly because it came from Niall, who he now lives with because they own a business together.
The way Niall stared with this look of such...disappointment. Not disappointment in Louis, disappointment in both of them because he knew they were going to put zero effort into resolving this. Niall knew that this was going to completely destroy the bond that spent their literal entire life building. Harry thinks back on it any time he sees the boy in public, any time he goes out, any time he does anything really. It's crazy to think that it all started in middle school, when they were literally thirteen and questioning.
He remembers that first kiss so vividly. The way that Louis' lips felt, how he always smiled at Harry after they kiss in such a way that it gave him hope that someday they could be together. Foolishness, he thinks back on it. At the time he loved that his best friend was his first kiss; made him feel all kinds of fuzzies in his stomach. But now, nearly ten years since the first time they kissed, Harry hates it. Hates how nothing feels the same. How no one else can give him fuzzies the way Louis did, and probably still would if they were together, or had at least spoken sometime within the past five years.
And it wasn't like Louis was the only one he'd had. He'd kissed and made out with plenty of peoples at parties and such. But none of them felt right, and he hates that he knows it's because they weren't from the person he called his best friend. But then again, you don't kiss your friends the way Louis would kiss Harry.
There was also the little things, the things that still bring a smile to Harry's face as he looks back. And of course, no surprise that Harry hates this as well. Maybe it was the way that Louis would always buy him little presents and make him take them even if Harry felt bad, that he loved the most. Or maybe it was the way that he would always hold Harry's hand in the hallway while they would walk to class- no, that just hurts now. It was those things that lead him on.
Yes, Harry was quite the idiot for literally allowing Louis to lead him on. He'd always find his way back to Louis because regardless; and he hated it because he knew exactly why. He knew that deep down he loved the way his best friend treat him. The thing about it all that still believed, is that friends, no matter how close, do not treat each other the way that Louis treated Harry. Friends are supposed to act like they're in love with each other, in Harry's opinion.
