Queen's first trip to Japan would turn out to be one of the lowest points in their career.
Disgusting rituals, hostilities, curses, tensions, betrayals how much worse can this get?
DISCLAIMER: This is all just a parody and should not be taken seriou...
It's April 22, 1975. Everyone gathered outside the hotel's garden to document a tea ceremony that the illustrious rock band, Queen got invited to, but there's a twist, it wasn't just an ordinary tea ceremony. It was actually a complex ritual that transforms musicians of any genre into J-POP stars.
The Japanese chose Queen as their sacrifices because they saw a huge potential for them to succeed as they are talented a lot in music already and if they were to make Japanese pop music, well. . .then there's nothing more to say other than the massive boost of income and popularity the Japanese music industry would receive.
Now let's start with the real story, shall we?
A big carpet that resembled tatami was placed on the grass, it was white and another shorter red carpet was placed on top of the white one that indicated the place they had to sit on.
A Japanese instructor was explaining what to do only to John because Roger is occupied with his car and Freddie is playing with a kendama he got from the Japanese alongside Brian.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
(This is the kendama if anyone didn't know what that is. ☝️)
''Splead youlserf's on the. . .redu calpetu, and take of youl shoesu,'' the instructor said, with a deep accent, but John was still able to understand her.
When we look back at Freddie playing with his new kendama. . .you could tell he never had this in his hands before because he tried to shoot the ball like it was a slight shot.
''Pew!'' the ball swung fast and hard, which was really entertaining to Freddie, ''Hahaha!''
Okay, it's gotten serious now. Freddie tried to play the kendama how it was intended to be played in the first place, with some beginner rules applied. . .unsurprisingly, but what actually surprising was. . .is that. . .he wasn't able to make the wooden ball land on the big cup!
Even with the ball being conveniently placed ON the big cup.
He sucked, but that could have been influenced by his restricted vision.
''Fuck!'' Freddie blurts out as he quickly shook his head to get rid of the long hair that stuck to his face.
It wasn't really effective, so he did it again.
''Hair!'' success! The frontman successfully got rid of the ebony hair that restrained his vision and now he can focus more on playing with the kendama. . .and look! He managed to make the ball land on the big wooden cup! (When he slightly made the round ball bounce off the wooden cup but that's just between you and me, capeesh?)
Freddie was ready for another round but got interrupted by Brian's offer.
''I'll hold your hair,'' while already having his hands ready. That's nice of him. You know. . .Brian is that type of friend, who's willing to hold your hair while you're vomiting like crazy after a wild night.
