*Liam*
My eyes were closed as i layed on my cream carpeted floor. I just couldn't get my head around everything Louis just said. He seemed perfectly innocent like nothing that bad ever happened to him. I opened one eye to see Megan deep in thought. I instantly knew she was think about the similarities between Harry and Nate. It was just looks trust me. We ran into him awhile back and it didn't end well for him.
Think something Happy Liam, my brain told me as i sighed and closed my eyes again. Everyone was dead silent. Megan gasped as the brand mark on Lou's hip. I couldn't bring myself to open my eyes. I knew what it looked like and it hurt me to think about it. I honestly felt like i might relapse but i couldn't tell anyone. It wasn't the time for something like this.
*Zayn*
I had enough of this pity, oh no, look what happened to him. They hurt him, blah blah blah. Megan is being a total idiot. I glared at her without her knowing. She is so stuck up. I am really starting to hate this chick. I hate a lot of people but the list she was on, only had a few people on it. Her, Paul our councilor... and my.... my dad, not that i would ever call him that anymore.
I gave in. This chick made Louis cry, Harry cry, Liam cry and she made my poor sweet Nialler cry. No one does that. My story wasn't sad but it wasn't happy. It was that story that pisses people off because of how lame it is. I didn't care. "I'm telling mine now." I heard Megan, Liam and Harry gasp. Niall and Louis would have if they weren't busy crying.
I held my Niall close and gently rocked him looking Megan in the eyes. You could see the distaste clearly on my face but i didn't care. I could stand this girl. She wanted to think i hated her fine, but whatever. she is a arrogant fuck anyway. "stop staring and shut up." I told her, even though she didn't say anything. She flinched back.
*Flashback: Our Lovely and very perky Zayn XD*
My story happened all my life. it wasn't just a short time thing. Mine was my whole life. My parents didn't know i was Bi-polar. They punished me often and were always disappointed in what i did. Not that i cared about that anyway. I knew they didn't love me. Well things got more interesting, when they yelled at me for not taking care of my youngest sister.
She was their spolied baby and it made me sick. I just so happen to be on one of my lows and this tends to cause very band things to happen. Of course my parents thought my Bi-polarism was fake so they just thought it was teenage angst. "Zayn, we told you to make her waffles, why couldn't you do such a simple task?! we get, you think you have our own life, but your sister comes first." My dad scolded.
It was normal until my oldest sister got into it. she was dressed like a Slag and always blamed when she got caught, which today she did. "Zayn and you have your sister dress like this?! do you want dishonor on your family!? we thought you were more respectable then this but i guess not. I'm calling the shrink." He said as he went to get his phone.
Haha i was about half a second from snapping. When my sisters friend Courtney spoke up. "Geez, Zayn i thought you liked your sister. I bet you just want to fuck her. That's why you make me and her dress like this." She snapped, twirling her dyed blonde hair around a finger. Snapping her bubble gum with her nine coat covered lip gloss lips.
I watched as her, my sister and dad left the room. Courtney winked at me before leaving, making sure to swing her hips in what she thought as a sexy way. Sadly for her, i was gay so yeah that wasn't gonna work, but did she just say i was into incest!? That was the last block to make the tower fall. Just like in Jenga. All hell was about to go down, in three, two..... one.
"You fucking stupid little bitch!!!! did you say i wanted to shag you?!" I yelled as i followed her into the dinning room, where she and my sister do homework. She looked at me and tried to me innocent. It didn't work. I leaned forward and pressed my hands on the table getting into her face. "Listen carefully you slut, i do not want to shag you or my dumb ass of a sister. Now your brother on the other hand. I would love to tap that."
I said as she looked at me shocked and with wide eyes. "Leave josh out of this..." she mumbled out and i laughed. "What if i told you, we all ready shagged. We tend to blow each other at lunch." I felt the smirk slowly sperd onto my face as she shuddered. "TMI!" she screamed and covered her ears. I laughed and moved her hands.
"I'm not done you little bitch, so listen carefully. If you ever say another fucking word to me, i will make sure to kill you, are we clear!?" well before i could get this out my dad was now back in the room. "ZAYN?!!? what do you think your doing!?" I turned and glared at him. "Now you listen to me, FATHER, i hate your fucking guts. You hate me, so punch me or whatever, i don't give a shit anymore. i just want away from you!"
I yelled and slammed the door behind me. I laughed as i walked out. I was so pissed. I ended up passing a cafe, and some guy tried to be nice i just broke the table or a couple and let. The police were after me by now and i didn't run. I just walked around like nothing was wrong. They passed me a few times before stopping and asking me a question. "Hey, kid you know its past crew few right?"
I looked to him. I know, my town has crew few for kids under 18 and i sadly was. I just rolled my eyes and kept walking. They soon got a call in about kid going around breaking tables with my description. Now i am not going to bore you with the long and boring chase and drama that went down. I shall skip to the part that is interesting.
I was now sitting in the police station my feet on the table. My dad walked in with a blank look on his face. "Me and your mother have decided to send you to Wolverhampton Mercy Hospital." He said in a dry voice. I went still... that was for crazy people. I glared and lost it again, breaking the table this time, cutting my hand open. "I AM NOT CRAZY!!" I yelled as i pushed him.
This caused my to get handcuffed... again may i might add. I was put in a holding cell until the next day were they took me to Mecry. I laughed at the name. They thought i was crazy, well good for them i didn't care anymore. I leaned back, hands still hand cuffed. I hated my new aid on site and said nothing, just to piss her off. She was so much like Courtney it wasn't even funny. They made me write a letter to expressive myself.
*Zayn's Letter:
yup so here you have it. Here i am. I'm stuck in this stupid place. No one tells me what's going on or will let me out of this room. I am not even fully sure why they sent me here, besides for a punched two cops and kneed one in a certain place. They always make their new "guests" as they call them, vent their feelings into letters. They think it will make us feel better, and after they read them, they pick if they get sent home or not. I found this very stupid.
Yeah i know, i find a lot of stuff stupid but that's beacuse it is. Even if i had to tell you all this in person, i still find it stupid and lame. They keep saying its gonna help me in the long run if i express myself. I do express myself just not the way they want me too. This damn letter idea is so annoying, i just don't get it. They fake being happy too to make it seem better. it only makes it worse.
"Dear Mum and Bastard who put me here."
can i even call you my parents anymore, i bet not. i'm not sure i want too even. It doesn't seem to fit right now. I don't even want to talk or call you anything, it just makes me want to blow your head off. oops, did i write that? oh well that wanted expression. I could B.S. this whole letter hoping you would get me out of here maybe, but even a stupid rock knows you wont. I think i should to a rock in this one. I would say give me all the answers to every question i have.
But as you can, you most likely will never write me back anyway. Even if this was approved my my nitwit twit of a aid. They say its a way to vent without harming someone else. I rather just punch you in face repeatedly then write thing dumb thing. Yeah i know my wish will never come true. How does it feel knowing your child, your son wants to punch you? I bet you can't tell because this is just a stupid piece of lined paper they gave me. Words on a page if you will.
You can't read emotion on a paper. So i guess i am out of luck, well good luck that is. I am filled with back luck. Oh wait wasn't i really out of luck before i was even born? Yup, yes i was. Oh wait back to the actual topic here. Your son, that is where i went off track now. Was i even your son? or was i just some waste of space that you let live in your house? I know you didn't actually love me. You spent all your time trying to believe the lie.
You were just lying to yourself. you lied to me, yourself and everyone else around you. You just weren't able to believe the words you told yourself everyday. It's all right though, i never believed them either. I guess we finally actually agree on something then. That's really strange now that i think about it. If i was ever scared of something it would be agreeing with you on something. I am not gonna pour my non existent heart out to you.
I never had one when it came to you. It's not gonna start now either. If i could say this right now to your face i would but here is the only verison i can give because youy fucking locked me up in this fucking place. It's better then home though so its okay. "Dad i hate you more then anyone anyone else. You let me down, big time. I even remember when you were teaching me to ride a bike for the first time. You promised never to let go.
That you were never going to give up on me, but look what has happened. you have given up on me. I always knew you would, so it doesn't hurt so bad. I knew ever since you said those words it would happen and it did. I guess it's better, sooner then later. I am so glad i never have to see you again. So all i ask,, is leave me the hell alone. Bye.
Now mum, if you do end up reading this i bet it hurts. for that i am sorry. I am sorry for letting you down everyday. please just listen to what i have to say. I still love you, i don't hate you. Yes SADLY i still love you. I'm not gonna beg for you to take away from this place. Just do this one simple thing for me. Before you think, no its not hiring someone to kill me or the bastard who sent me here. I just want you to forget about me, and everything i have done to hurt you.
Just act like i have never existed, it shouldn't be that hard, you do it all the time anyway. You don't need to remember any of the pain i caused. It will be easier on everyone if you do it. So just try for me. Don't have dad forget though, he needs to remember the pain, he caused. This is all his fault, i'm sick and he didn't believe me. One last thing, I'm sorry for everything."
*Zayn: Falsh back but not done*
I handed the letter over to my aid. I never spoke a word and i didn't need too. They soon later put me on some meds that help keep the chemicals in balance and they worked. I was realized three years later. I was glad to get rid of my aid Ed. He was annoying.
*Now: Niall*
I rubbed Zayns back as he finished talking. The room was heavy with silence. Zayn has never shared before. Not even at group, he just tells Paul to bugger off and leave him alone. I kissed his cheek. I was so proud of him to share that with me, with all of us but mostly me. Inside i smiled at his accomplishment but i just whispered something sweet in his ear and laughed at his next words. "Now Megan share so i can fix my hair."
