(ON HOLD) Desperate Needs

Chapter 1~ The move out.

I exhale a long sigh, as I secure the packaging tape onto the cardboard box full of my items. The sunshine squeezes through my blinds onto the hardwood floor beneath me. Move out day had quickly arrived. Mom and Dad had moved here in search of new career paths, but are yet to find one. I'm so tired of everything, but am yet to give up. I push the box as it slides across the floor. Just a couple more items. I put them into the box one at a time, making sure to be gentle. I've been told that I get attached to things too easily; and to be honest they're not wrong. Everything I grow fond of I get attached to. Any memories, and moments. Which may explain why I'm not very extatic to move out. I've lived in this house my entire life, and have made so many memories. But maybe it'll be good to let go, cause along with those good memories comes a load of bad ones. For one, my mental health has only gotten worse in the last year, but luckily someones been here for me. Georgia. Shes my everything, and has honestly helped me through so much. And now I'm leaving her. She promised me that we'd stay in contact and that she would never leave me, and I believe her, but what if her number changes? Or she does stop talking to me? Or something happens to her and I'm not there? I don't know what I'm gonna do without her.

I flop back onto the white rug that has lined the bottom of my bed for years now, and start day dreaming.
This is taking so long.
Well it's only gonna take longer if I don't keep going.
Stop procrastinating.
Work.
Go.

I continue to lay back on the carpet, brushing my fingers back and forth against the loose strings.

C'mon, move.
Hurry the hell up and stop wasting time.
You're only gonna dissapoint yourself if you don't get this done.
Look at you, you can't even complete a simple task like taping a box shut.
How pathetic.
Why are you even trying?

I turn to my side shaking my head a little bit, trying to make the thoughts go away.

You're a mess,
you can't do anything right,
and you wonder why people don't love you?
You're a disappointment, a mista-

*bang, bang, bang*

Startled, I quickly sit up at stare at the door.

"Are you almost done? The moving truck will be here any minute now." Mom says ergently.
"Yeah! Almost done, mom."

The thoughts scatter away as I rip off a foot long piece of tape and flatten it out onto the final box. I stand up and grab a couple of the boxes, glancing out of my window a final time.

~~~~~~

Thirty minutes later I'm sitting in my car driving to the airport, watching the rain slide against the window, the windshield wiper moving back and forth. Suprisingly, there's not much on my mind. Just thinking. Thinking about what will come from moving to NC. Maybe I'll be happier, maybe my parents will have more luck with finding a new career. Maybe I'll move out. I want to move out, create a new start. I want to start over. But for now I'm stuck here, and I think I'm okay with that. The car hums gently as it drives down the straight road, music quietly playing from the radio.