Lolita 'revamped'

Chapter 3

When I'm In the bathroom stall eating a bag of chips is when I really feel like crying. I don't have any more money on my lunch card nor anyone to sit with. Sometimes I really question why I even eat, I'm not hungry, I know I'm just going to throw it all up afterward, so why do I do it?

I wipe the crude off my hands before opening the door to go wash my hands. No one usually uses the bathrooms during lunch hour so I was pretty shocked to see a girl applying an extra coat of lip gloss in the mirror. I didn't say a word and she didn't either, I kept my head down and hers kept on bouncing to the rhythm of a song that was playing through her headphones. I couldn't hear much but I could make out the chorus.

Rhiannon rings like a bell through the night/

And wouldn't you love to love her?/

I recognized the song. It was a song my mother would softly hum along to while washing dishes or tucking me into bed. She used to take me by the hands and twirl me around as the women did in the video. Back then I felt magical and majestic, back then she looked magical and majestic, I don't understand how we both lost that energy. Where are you now, mother?

Tears threatened to spill out of my eyes as I hummed along to the song, but humming quickly turned into feathery singing.

"She is like a cat in the dark/

And then she is the darkness/

She rules her life like a fine skylark/

And when the sky is starless/

Once in a million years, a lady like her rises/

Oh no, Rhiannon, you cry, but she's gone/

Your life knows no answer, your life knows no answer..."

I kept going, ignoring the tight feeling in my chest. I tried to stay away from this song, the song that brought back so many memories that were unwanted. The song that reminded me of how lonely I truly was and forever will be. I could feel the warm tips of my mother's fingers in my palms, replacing the cold water that encircled them. Beneath my feet, I felt hers, I felt her cheek against mine and her lips telling me wonderful lies. I felt it all as if it was just yesterday. I no longer felt like crying, I felt like dancing and singing like I used to with my mother.

Taken by, taken by the sky

Taken by, taken by the sky

Taken by, taken by the sky

Dreams unwind

Love's a state of mind

Dreams unwind

Love's a state of mind

The music started to tread off but it played in my head like a broken record. Dream unwind, Love's a State of Mind. Just like that, I shot out of the dazed state I was entranced in. I looked at my side to find no one standing there. I couldn't say I was disappointed. I quickly finished washing my hands, then I dried them off. I slung my bag over my shoulder but when I did a piece of paper fluttered to the ground. I picked it up and opened it. It was a note, it read-

'All your life you've never seen a woman/

Taken by the wind/

Will, you ever win?/

Will, you ever win?/'