"Show me pictures, come on!" Jimin says while suspiciously eyeing my phone. I shove it into my jeans pocket. It was day-one post meeting this mysterious girl online. I knew nothing about her besides her username on that app, her country and her profile picture, which might as well be fake. But I remember exactly how I felt throughout the hours I had spent talking to her. I felt a strong connection, without realizing that it'd be the beginning of something I never thought would happen to me; Kim Taehyung.
Jimin tries to take my phone out of my pocket, he's always been so persistent with things that catch his attention. But what was he going to say when I tell him that I basically know nothing about this girl yet there's something awfully charming about her and I find myself wanting to stick around just to find out what it is? He'd think I'm crazy! And I might very well be.
"Okay, fine. Have it your way" Jimin lifts his hands up in the air and turns to the comic book he has sprawled before him on the ground of our college campus. I regard him with a clueless look, not knowing whether I should just tell him everything now, or keep it to myself until there's actually something to tell.
I go with the latter.
"Are you not going to attend French?" I ask him and look down at my hand-watch, "The class is about to start" I add. Jimin shakes his head with his lips puckered as he skims through the comic book, then pauses to give me a look.
"What?" I ask, confused. He huffs and closes the comic book then turns to face me fully, our knees touching.
"I just—I don't know why you'd keep things from me. We've been through so much already but you decide to keep this one silly thing from me. Why?" He asks, his eyes doing that thing again where he ends up looking like a sad puppy. I hold my ground.
"Jiminie, you already know all there is about it." I lie.
His eyes inspects me for a moment before he nods his head in acceptance and turns away from me. "Okay. I'll trust you on this one, Kim Taehyung." He says, and I find myself sighing in relief.
"Only because I don't want to seem like I'm pushing you or anything, unless you want to tell me, of course. But don't know how which would—"
"There's nothing to tell."
"That works too." He smiles a fake smile that doesn't reach his eyes, "Let's go to French, then." He collects his stuff then stands to his feet. Looking back at me, he puts his hand out for me.
"You didn't forget that we're both taking this class, did you?" I did forget. In fact, the only thing that's on my mind right now is whether that girl is online and if I can talk to her. Away from Jimin. I take his hand and he pulls me up to my feet. I dust my jeans off and shake my head in response to his question.
"Let's go." I say, and usher him to start walking. Jimin nods then finally turns his back to me and I quickly pull out my phone to check my notifications: Zero.
I sigh. Shoving the phone back into my pocket, I brisk walk after Jimin until we are walking side by side.
❆❆❆
It is well past nine after I step into my bedroom, it is quite and cold like it usually is whenever it is February. I throw my backpack aside and grab my laptop before settling on my bed and turning the device on. I couldn't get that girl out of my head for the last few hours, or should I say, ever since I connected with her on that app a day ago. I said hi, she said hi back, then proceeded to ask me how I was, and I told her she seemed human, unlike the other people on this app who greeted me like a trained robot would.
I insert my password and press the enter button, my desktop screen comes to view. I waste no time in accessing my web browser and logging into the app, and to my absolute delight, there she was. Online. Her profile picture was still the same.
KimTae94: Hey!
AVil90: You're back!
KimTae94: Of course I am, how are you?
AVil90: Glad to have you back :P how about you?
I look away from my laptop screen, my eyes making contact with my reflection in the full-length mirror in front of me; I was blushing.
KimTae94: I'm good. Long day at school, you know. Just the norm.
AVil90: Oh, what year are you in?
KimTae94: I'm a college senior, actually. What about you?
AVil90: A master's student here. I thought you'd be older!
Oh, she's older.
KimTae94: I thought the 94 in my username had given it away? Haha.
AVil90: AVil90 typing...
My heart starts beating fast in anticipation of her reply. I make the mistake of looking away from the screen and I'm met with my reflection. Again. I growl. What is happening to me? I get out of my bed and decide to sit at my desk instead. Good. No reflections.
I look back at my laptop screen, and there it was. The little damned red circle next to her username, which only indicated one thing; she is no longer online.
This has also happened the first time we chatted, I was in the midst of explaining my own point of view on polyamory when the little red circle made an appearance and we were no longer connected. She told me how she thought polyamory was okay as long as the people involved agreed to it. I remember agreeing with her on the consent part, but I still questioned if it was real love. Can one truly fall in love with more than one person at the same time? Or has society conditioned us to think that there is only one right person whom we must find in order to have our so-called happily ever after? I often contemplated on that, and each time I would end up with the same conclusion; there is no such thing as one soulmate, but instead, we each have multiple soulmates that includes friends, family members or even strangers.
What if this online stranger, was one of my destined soulmates?
I need to find out.
