The Equation For Disaster

Chapter One

"Iz, come on out please" A soft voice called from the other side of my locked door "We're obviously worried about you. Please talk to one of us."

I stared out my window not moving, not saying a word.

"Iz, you haven't come out or ate in a few days. Please come out here" Another voice pleaded from the other side of my locked door

"If you don't come out I'm coming in" The voice of my angry older brother Jon growled from the other side of my door 

"Jonathan!" My mother barked "Iz, honey. I'm gonna unlock this door if you don't open it"

Click

My door flew open and I instantly knew my parents and brothers all came rushing to my side once they saw the blade sitting next to me and the blood covering my blankets on my window sill. 

"Izzy!" My mother cried "Oh Izzy!" I felt arms wrap around me and wet drops slide down the back of my neck, but I couldn't bother to move. I felt so numb. 

"Iz" Jon choked kneeling in front of me applying pressure to my forearms which had blood seeping out of them "Brandon! Call 9-1-1! Now!" 

"Peter take Oliver to his room and play with him" My dad ordered sitting beside me "Iz honey. It's not your fault. We don't blame you at all. It was an accident and you know it"

"What do you guys want me to do?" My other brother Cy asked looking for direction on how to help my situation

"Just go to your rooms boys" My dad barked

It started pouring rain outside and the pattering of the rain hitting the glass in front of me made me feel even more numb. I couldn't feel anything. No emotions. No pain. Nothing, but emptiness. 

~~

"Mmm" I groaned opening my eyes as bright sunlight filled my eyes and the smell of alcohol and cleanliness swept over me. The hospital. 

"I don't know when I'll be back, No I'm at the hospital with mom and dad. No she's still unconsci-" My brother Taylor walked into the hospital room and froze when he saw me laying there with my eyes open.

"Tay? Yo Tay? What's going on?" A voice yelled from the other end of the line

"I'm gonna call you back" He hung up his phone and set the coffee in his hand on the table beside me "Iz" He let out a sigh of relief as he pulled me into a warm safe embrace "Oh my god, what were you thinking? You scared the hell outta me" He hugged me even tighter

"Tay it hurts" I moan softly and he lets me go

"Sorry, you just had me so worried. Goddammit. We already lost Carter, we don't need to lose you too. Especially this close. What in the hell were you thinking? You scared the hell outta all of us. Jesus, Iz, how could you be so fucking selfish? Cutting yourself? Killing yourself? Seriously, have you gone crazy?" He lectured angrily as tears slid down my face as he reminded me of how much he really cares even if he lives miles away from me now

"I'm sorry Tay" I mumbled looking to my twiddling thumbs letting tears slide down my cheeks falling off my chin onto the blanket

"I'm sorry, I shoulda stayed longer. Kept a better eye on you. I never thought you'd do this" He looked out the window ashamed of himself

"It wasn't you" I mumbled touching his forearm and he looked to me tears welling in his eyes

"I just don't ever wanna see you like this ever again. Or you'll be in very big trouble with me" He glared at me then coughed loudly to wake up my parents who were fast asleep in the chairs beside my hospital bed