what does it matter to live out the rest of my life

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jungkook slept on the couch again that night. jitae just couldn't deal with cuddling right now and jungkook just felt bad, so they moved away - jungkook of course refusing to let jitae sleep out in the living room. so that's how is was.

they awoke the next morning at different times in their different rooms. jungkook awoke first and made himself breakfast, jitae awoke during that time and did the same. not a word was spoke between them.

jitae grabbed some clothes and got changed in the bathroom, brushing his teeth and fixing his hair while he was in there. he wore black jeans and a bright-red, slightly-baggy sweater, plus a light tan beanie. to this ensemble he would add some simple canvas slip ons and his little black bag for his phone, wallet, and drink bottle. it was fairly simple, but he felt comfortable in it - what was he thinking, they were his clothes, he bought them, of course he felt comfortable in them.

jungkook got dressed in their room, having to pause after removing his shirt as his mind was just too full - full of the fact that he had gone backwards... they were moving apart again and he didn't want that. all the progress that he had made to get jitae to love him again was gone and he didn't want that. he couldn't lose jitae, not really. today he wore brown loose pants and a dark grey sweater.

they headed to work in silence as well, jungkook thought they had sorted this out but he supposed they hadn't. he would talk to jitae later, let him sit a little longer. he'd messed up enough he didn't want to make it worse; considering the last time he tried to help he believed he had a track record to do something bad whenever he tried.

jitae, however, just felt empty today. random images and lone emotions tied to dates and flavours were swirling and falling into place in his mind, memories of vague things that everyone has experienced like going to the supermarket or being on a bus, nothing he could make sense of and nothing of any significance, and he hated that.

they parked outside the building. jungkook walked jitae as far as he could, then left without a sound.

they were both hurting.

jitae went inside the space he was told he works. he had no idea where anything was so he supposed this was just as good of a start as any. the door was an opaque iced white, the printed sticker sign on the glass said 'wardrobe'. he knocked before opening the door, within was quite the surprise.

there were hangers and manikins and fabrics on tables filling the room. currently a boy of around maybe seventeen or eighteen was in getting a shirt tailored by a woman in around her mid or late thirties, the pair standing in front of the mirror that ran the length of one wall as though this was a repurposed dance studio.

"jitae!" the boy says, spotting jitae coming through the door in the mirror. jitae recognised him as one of the boys from the group, what was his name again.

"oh! jitae you're here. right, kai get that off, go practice dance or something. we can finish this later," the woman says, helping the boy remove the heavily clipped shirt. kai turns around while the shirt was removed, waving to jitae with a bright smile. he had a plain black tshirt underneath, over which was quickly pulled a white champion hoodie.

"i'll let the others know your back, you've been missed," kai grins. jitae nods, smiling back with a sadder smile than the one given to him from the bouncy boy before him. "you don't remember us, do you?"

"i'm sorry," jitae admits with a sigh. kai simply nodded his head and continued to smile. "if it helps, i don't remember anything anyway," jitae adds.

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