Joey and the Gang | Book 1

Introduction / Chapter One

I walk into Olive Garden off of I-95 on a Saturday night.

The bar in the middle of the restaurant is pretty empty except a lonesome elderly woman sitting in the shadows. She had to be at least 90 years old.

We make eye contact while she chugs down her drink. I head to the bar and take a seat on a stool.

"What would you like today?" the bartender asks.

"Bloody Mary please", I give the bartender a wink and she walks off to make my drink. I sit there in silence and look around the atmosphere.

Soon, the bartender returns with my alcoholic drink. I thank her and she stalks off.

I drink in peace for a few minutes until i hear someone take a seat next to me. I look to my left and I see the elderly woman from before looking dead ahead with no emotion. She orders a gin and tonic.

"You looking for a good time sweets" she says with a voice of a chain smoker. I can smell the alcohol in her breath from miles away and you can tell she has taken every drug out there. (a/n: she has)

I feel uncomfortably turned on and i didn't know why. She reminds me of an expired key lime pie, but there something in her eyes that draws me to her. I'd def smash.

"I don't know it depends on how drunk i get" i reply with a smirk.

"The names Ms. Keisha" she's says before she breaks into a coughing fit, coughing up a live rat in the process. The rat scurries away into the dark corner of the Olive Garden.

I suddenly feel more turned on. At this point i'm ready to dick down right here right now but i control myself.

I accidentally slip the words "Dicks out for harambe" while imagining everything i can do to her.

Ms Keisha looks at me in a disappointing glare. "Thanks for killing the vibe with your fucking 2016 memes you ducking shower curtain."

"Ducking?" i question.

"Oh sorry autocorrect lol."

'Damn what she on??' i think to myself.

"What's a guy like you doing in this part of town on a saturday night, don't you young millenials have some hipster shit to do?" she questions before chugging her drink in a flash.

"I'm stressed and needed a distraction" i answer, looking at her.

"Ahh i see", she looks at me before saying " Well i got some story to tell if you need a distraction."

I look at her thinking if i would really want to, but say fuck it i have nothing else better to do. " Tell me more" i press on wanting to hear what she has to say.

"Well it all started about 70 years ago..."

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a/n : this chapter is taken place in current times. It's in first person bc this chapter is from  'bar guy's point of view. Bar guy doesn't really have a name. He's just an unlucky, random guy that walks into a bar and has to hear the weirdest and craziest story. Enjoy!