Forever Beside | Joshua Hong

3

That afternoon was rainy, but it didn't stop Julia's routine.
She was holding a bag of groceries and slowly continued walking on the road across the coffee shop.

"What are you doing, miss?" A boy in his lime raincoat looked up at her. It was indeed a simple question, but little did he know both of them wondered what the answer was.

"What am I doing?" She asked unconsciously to herself. "I'm..." She looked around, searching for an answer in the bicycle shop displayed next to her. The fusty old-fashioned bicycle facing her didn't seem to give out any hints whatsoever.
"I'm... Well..."

"I don't really know what I'm doing." She awkwardly replied, fixing the grip on her umbrella cane. The little kid let out a little laugh. "Can you help me cross the street, miss?". Julia agreed and they both crossed the wet road.

The boy screamed a thanks before running to a mini-market nearby. She decided to order a coffee before going to her apartment. After receiving her order, she proceeded her journey, memories of the two still spinning in her head.

"Julia?"

The person with the name turned around, searching for its source. He was familiar, his voice quite evolved along with his age, but Julia's lips formed a smile, brave enough to call out his name. "Junhui?" She said. Junhui pulled her into a hug. "It's been so long." He said. Julia held her umbrella firm and tight, almost wanting to cry. She wanted Joshua to hug her. She wanted Joshua to tell her how much he missed her. She wanted Joshua, not Junhui. That was a sad fact that was in her head but didn't quite get there.

"How are you?" Junhui was extremely happy. He had always loved her since the days when he worked in that mini-market. Julia took him as her older brother most of the time, but Junhui would never fool himself. He loved her even though it was one-sided. "I'm doing well. How about you?" She said. "I'm doing very great. Do you need help with those groceries?" He asked.

They ended up walking to her apartment in awkward silence. Junhui didn't mind it though. He was just glad to see her again, unlike someone else. Julia offered him to stay for dinner and he complied, helping her with some cooking. The older noticed there was something off with her and he tried his best to try make her feel better, without caring what caused it.

"You're beautiful, Jule. But you look more beautiful when there's a smile on your face." He said with his eyes on the cutting board. "Um... thanks." She muttered before chuckling. "I'm sorry, I'm just really tired from this new job. There's a lot in my mind lat-" "Let me take you out next Saturday." Interrupting her as he grabbed two plates and arranged the dining table for their friendly dinner. "That is, if you're free..." Junhui almost cursed on his own words, remembering Julia and Joshua's history.

"I don't really know, Jun." It was hard for her to believe that she would want to spend some quality time with Junhui.
Another man was filling up her head.
"I might be a bit busy." Julia said, sitting across the other, turning on the television across the room to minimize the awkwardness.

They both enjoyed the dinner but even the dirty pot and pans in the kitchen sink knew Junhui would loved it even more if Julia enjoyed it like he did. When Julia finished dipping their plates in soap water, Junhui was already behind her and after she just turned around, he held her body to his chest. "I'm sure whatever it is, you can get through it." He whispered, making Julia's tears finally run down her lids.

"You deserve to feel better." His heart cracked a little when she continued crying out her tears. "I'm here, Jule. You can cry it all out."

It felt wrong.

It felt wrong for him to hold her like that when it's his first day meeting her again. He was lucky enough to spend a dinner alone with her and to hug her the seventh second after she realized who called out the name. He was lucky enough to know that the girl he loved existed. He felt like it was too much of a blessing to receive. If it had something to do with Joshua Hong, he would let her go for him again and maybe triedto find interest on someone else.

It felt wrong for her to cry in his shirt when it's about another man. She wondered if he would leave if he knew what it was about. She wondered if he would still care about her if she told him to get out and leave her alone at that moment. It was a pathetic reason to get all sad and gloomy, that's what she thought at least.

"It's getting late, you should head home." Julia managed to form some words between her sobs. "I'm not leaving you like this." He chuckled, still holding the shorter warmly. They stood there for some time, waiting for the sobs to lessen before Junhui decided it was best for her to get some rest.

He handed her a glass of milk before walking to the door, giving her an assuring smile. "Get some sleep, Jule." She nodded to his sentence. "And um..." He looked away just to plant a kiss on her forehead. "Goodnight." He whispered.

*