The Sophomore || Tori Kelly

Avalanche

tuesday evening

Lifeless eyes stared out into the trees and houses below the bluff. Her fingers tingled, letting her know it was time to switch arms. Tears soaked through her already wet sleeve. How could I let this happen? Tori's mind roamed. She was under house arrest and the only contact to the outside world she got was through André. He was only allowed over on Sundays. But, that rule only applied if he made it to church. No church, no Tori. This had been the arrangement for three weeks since Tori was released from the hospital. However, today was different.

Words like a loaded gun
Shot out from a fire tongue

Tori looked back in her wheelchair to see André holding a beats pill over his head. A short chuckle came over her, but ultimately confusion set in. "What are you doing here? It's only Tuesday?" Tori asked. André set the pill on the table and walked into the grass, pulling Tori up from her seat.

"Your mom said you hadn't stopped crying since I left Sunday night. And I couldn't have my baby girl, sad. So, I came back," he smiled, wrapping his arms around her waist as her arms took their rightful spot around his neck. "You hear that?" He smirked, swaying them to the beat. Tori nodded.

Look out now, don't take one more step

"What about it?" Tori vaguely recognizing the song, but not knowing why.

"This song was playing the first time we kissed at the party. And I played it to Addi as I worked up the nerve to tell you that I loved you for the first time. I feel like this is kind of our song," André smiled. Tori wiped the last of her tears and stared at her goof of a boyfriend with a grin.

"I don't know if I feel the same, but this was nice," Tori smiled. She wanted to stay in the moment forever but knew that it was going to end. It was just a matter of time. "How long are you staying?" Tori asked. André ran his hand over his messy hair and shrugged.

"Your Dad was okay with me staying until your therapy session tomorrow," André replied. Tori's eyes went wide.

"Wait, what? He's letting you stay overnight?" Tori asked in disbelief. She never would've thought that her father would allow anything like that.

"Yeah, but I have to sleep in Noah's room. And your door has to be open the entire time," André recited. He had been given the layout of his stay before coming outside. To say he wasn't a fan, was an understatement, but he was going to oblige to see his love.

"Lucky for you, my brother is sort of a neat freak, so you won't have to worry about sleeping in a dirty room. My room, on the other hand, has turned into a pharmacy. I have anti-depressants that I don't need. I have uppers, downers, sleeping pills, and all these things that I don't want," Tori sighed, pulling away from André and slumping back into her chair. André pulled up a seat next to her, searching her eyes.

"Come on, baby, talk to me," André pleaded. Tori pulled her knee to her chest and rested her chin on the black fabric of her yoga pants.

"They are treating me like I wanted to kill myself! I didn't! I just wanted to feel nothing. When I was drunk or high, I didn't think about Josh or the rape or the baby," Tori sighed. André took a deep breath, before leaning towards Tori.

"I heard somewhere that in order for God to take away the pain you have to walk in your ugly, so he can strip you down to your truth," he started. Tori's face went sour, making her almost angry at André for speaking so candidly.

"I am walking in my truth!" She yelled. It took everything in André to hold his composure. He wanted nothing more than to grab Tori and shake her out of the fantasy world she lived in. However, he had to be patient with her and God was definitely showing him that. But he couldn't be silent and tiptoe on eggshells with her anymore. He had spent 3 weeks, watching what he said or changing subjects because Tori wasn't ready. And he told himself he was gonna do it. He was going to give her time. But, push came to shove and at the end of the day, André was willing to take the hit so long as Tori came back to the fun, loving girl he fell in love with. Even if she came back to her without him by her side.