Book Of RANDOMNESS

Maybe Never

"Best Friend"

that's the word I've always been called at, that's the word that hurts me the most.

I am Neil the best friend of Hana, I've always been there for her, from the toughest of times and the happiest of her mood.

Neil's POV

Hana and I have been best friends since we are in first grade, I have always supported her, guided her, and advised her about the things she loves to do.

I am there if she needed me because I'm the one who knows her the most, but lately she began to avoid me, ignore me, or even to the extent of not talking to me. I don't remember having an argument with Hana, we've always treated each other as our own personal living diaries where we tell each other everything but now.....

She had found her dream man...

I've only knew this when I saw her kissing another guy, they've been together for a week now but they look like an old couple, I thought to myself that maybe, just maybe my duty is over but I was wrong, it was not over instead I should be there for her almost every time. The guy made her cry because she didn't show up on their date on time and broke up with her, she was desperate to have a lover, she wanted a lover who understands her, and a lover who will be kind only for her but what she also want is a lover who is good looking.

It has been a week but she still didn't change, she avoided and ignored me every time I call her or go to her, I've given up, I just let her be alone for a while but what I didn't know is the word 'while' will be for a whole year. I talked to her and got a response...

"please don't go near me... My boyfriend doesn't like it" she said coldly as if she was talking to a stranger

My rage started to rise up and of course I scolded her before storming off and going home, I couldn't take it anymore, her arrogant attitude just because she found her lover, her smiles that were never meant for me and her words that were always hurtful, I've endured for a whole year but now I've reached my limit, I can't do it anymore...

I left to go to my parents on another country and I didn't say a word to her, if she were to finish our friendship then I will make her realize on how important friendship is. I've been with my parents for five years before I came back.

I drove off to my house and found her belongings outside the door, however I didn't see her anywhere, I decided to ignore it and unlock the door before going inside, to my surprise I saw her on the couch sleeping peacefully with her face facing the TV, I silently walked towards her and poked her forehead "don't wake me up... Don" she mumbled as she swept my hand away but I kept on poking her until she wakes up in a bad mood "I said don't wake me up D--" when she opened up her eyes she was shocked to see me again and immediately hugged me tightly.

I miss her warmth, I miss her.

I returned her hug but after a few seconds she pulled back and looked at me angrily "where have you been!? Do you know how worried I've been!?" she asked me madly, I just looked at her with a small smile at my face "well I have been with my parents since you told me to avoid you and I didn't tell you because I want you to feel what I've felt in that one year that you did the same " I told her truthfully, she just rolled her eyes at me and smiled "oh I see... But since you're here I will deliver you a good news!" she excitedly said and before I can even think my world started to crumble apart.

"I am pregnant"

Those three words are not what I expected to hear, I faked a smile "congratulations!" I said happily, she smiled at me but that smile hurts me, I know that the father is Don whom she spoke off earlier but I also know that from now on she can be mine anymore..

I watched her as she walked out of my house into the car of Don, once the door closed my tears began to make their way on my cheeks to the cold tiled floor, my knees felt weak making me kneel to the ground, I hated myself, I hated the fact that I didn't say it to her,  and I hated that she is bearing the child of another man.

"I love you"

Those words that I wanted to say and hear back from her lovely voice, the word that kept me going, the word that killed my happiness, the word that is too late to say.

After wiping my tears away, I gathered my strength back and stood up, looking at my surroundings nothing has changed except that all her things are gone, as I look at the table top I saw a note, it's from her, the girl I've dreamed of having but became the nightmare that I'll always remember. Scanning the note, it's a normal note with a drawing of a heart, as I red it my hear started to ache and my tears started to flow again...

Dear Neil,

I know that you'll come back today, and I'm very sorry about the things I have said before but I'm just waiting for you because I want to give you one last goodbye.

You're the best best friend in the whole world! Thank you!

Your bff,
Hana

I laughed at myself, to think that I've fallen in love with the person who only thought of me as her best friend, to think that the word will be so hurtful, I really am stupid, stupid enough to let her go into the hands of another man...

I cherished the letter, kept all her secrets, waited for her visits everyday,  and now I'm standing on her grave thinking of all the beautiful memories we had, even if my hair turned white I will always love her, never will it stop, never will it replace.

As I stood in front of her grave, my tears began to flow...

"I love you" I said with all of my heart hoping that she will hear it or....
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.
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Maybe Never...

Creator: Me (Kin)
PS. I'm sorry if there's a bad grammar, wrong spellings, and if the story is bad.