Married But Alone

Chapter 11

Mary was used to the attention she was receiving, she was a queen after all, it was natural for the people to look and bow to her, what she’s not used to however, is the glance that the people have been throwing at her, it wasn’t a look of respect or admiration at the very least, they were look of shock and sympathy. Well maybe they were shock to see her pregnant, but the sympathetic looks? She doesn’t quite understand them. Finally, Mary found Catherine, but what’s odd is she’s weeping

“Catherine, what happened? Why are you crying? And some of the servants are throwing me sympathetic looks, would you please tell me what’s going on? Mary said demandingly

“My son, your husband, died earlier this morning”

Mary can almost hear here world crumble, she puts her hand on his belly as if attempting to hide from her child that his/her father is dead. Francis is dead? My husband is dead? This can’t be happening, please, please someone tell me this isn’t true, thousands of thoughts run in her head but she managed to speak to Catherine

“That’s not true” Mary said while tears are running on her cheeks, she unconsciously walks backwards in disbelief

“Please tell me that my husband is alive, please Catherine” Mary said pleadingly

“We found him lifeless on his bed this morning, there were stains of blood in his pillow”

“You’re lying!” Mary shouted still unable to believe the dreadful news

“I wish I am Mary, do you think I like delivering this news to you?”

“Where is he? I need to see him.” Mary said hoping that when she sees her husband, his eyes would still be open and he’d be delighted to see his wife and her growing belly

“He’s in the infirmary” Catherine muttered

~^oOo^~

Mary barged in the infirmary and found Nostradamus

“Where is Francis?” Mary said as her voice trembled. Nostradamus points to a lifeless body covered by white cloth.

“I’m sorry Mary, I wasn’t able to save him” that’s all that Nostradamus said, there’s nothing he can say to ease Mary’s pain so he just decided to leave her alone with Francis.

Mary walks slowly to the lifeless body, she never imagined that their reunion would be like this, she gently removed the white cloth covering its face, and that’s when she broke down. Francis is dead, she’s now seeing him with her very own eyes, lifeless, pale, thin, firm, he isn’t breathing and he’s heart isn’t beating. She kissed his forehead and murmured

“Why did you leave me Francis? Why didn’t you wait for me to come back?” she said while caressing his face now wet because of her tears

“We are going to have a child, how do you expect me to raise him alone?” she said while sobbing

“I need you Francis” she’s crying uncontrollably now, she touched his blond curls gently and kissed his forehead once again

She stayed still for a few moments and finally whispered

“I will always love you” she left the room and glances back at least three times before closing the door, she couldn’t stand to see her husband that way although it pains her to leave him, she went to her chambers and closed the door quickly, she leans herself to it and slowly slides down as she buries her face in her hands.

~^oOo^~

Kenna, Lola and Greer are all in Mary’s room to comfort her, and though they know Mary is inconsolable right now, they still stayed to be with their queen.

“My child would never see her father, just like me, he/she will grow up with only one parent” Mary said while crying, she’s been crying for hours now but her tears seem to be infinite

“That’s why you need to be strong Mary, your child only has you” Lola said

“You’re not alone Mary, we’re here for you, we will always be” Greer said while holding Mary’s hand

“I know there’s nothing we can do to ease your pain now but we’re here” Kenna said helplessly

“I know that you’re all here for me and I’m thankful for that, I just don’t know what to do without Francis, I used to think that I can do anything with him by my side, but now that he isn’t here—“ Mary wasn’t able to finish what she’s about to say and begin crying again. Her friends can do nothing but hug her as she cries irrepressibly for a few more hours.

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“Wake up your grace, wake up!” Leila said with panic in her voice

Mary opened her eyes and looked to Leila with confusion, they were still on the carriage and they haven’t arrived in French court yet

“You were just dreaming, your grace”

Mary let her words sink in as she wiped her tears, she has been crying while dreaming and now she feel so relieved knowing that her husband might still survive and she might still see him alive. The pain she felt while dreaming seemed real and agonizing as well, she wouldn’t want to experience that again, even if it was just in a bad dream.

“your grace, you’re bleeding!” Leila said, the urgency in her voice clear

Mary looked down and saw what her midwife is referring to, her dress is now wet with blood. She have been unaware of her physical state because of her dream and when she sees her dress soaked with blood, she begins to panic, she felt the same pain she experienced while seeing Francis dead in her dream, but this is different, this is not a dream, this is real, she wish she’s still dreaming but unfortunately, she isn’t it.

She touched Leila’s arm and mumbled while teary-eyed

“Save my baby, please…I beg of you.”