I'm alone, I'm ugly, I'm fat and I'm afraid.
I look for an escape to make the sadness go away.
To my right I see a sharp, tiny silver blade.
I pick it up as the tears start dripping down my face.
My wrist already covered in fifty two scars.
Nine more won't hurt, thats sixty one so far.
I push it down and hard, firmly on my skin.
The blood drips out turning my frown into a grin.
The burning sensation overwhelmes my small body.
I forget all my problems and no longer worry.
I'll be fine for only about a day or two.
Til' I get on a scale and it reads ninety two.
I'll pick up a sharp blade and just cut once again.
Everything will be alright, then i'll see my reflection.
My eyes completely fill with disgust
at this point, cutting is becoming a must.
Day by day the cutting will continue.
It's unpleasant addiction gaurenteed to destroy you.
As the months go by, depression slowly grows.
My thoughts of suicide begin to overflow.
The starving, the vomitting and the constant judgements.
They hurt me, break me; It's a never ending torment.
No one knows I'm broken, the pretty smiles keep it hidden
but inside I'm breaking by all the insults that are given.
I cant't help but remember november twenty second,
The day I was left with my virginity taken.
I was crying and sobbing as I told the police.
They said rape was common and they'd try to help me.
So much has happened over so little time.
My father passed away without saying goodbye.
I think about life and how i want it to end.
This isnt a joke, no game of pretend.
I'm alone, I'm ugly, I'm fat and I'm afraid.
I look for an escape to make the sadness go away.
I see my life in flash and all the smiles that were fake.
I want it all to end, One Deep Cut is all it takes.
