don't go home without me

6.

The first day of uni excited me way more than I had already expected. I chose my courses wisely and this day was the proof that I had picked the right ones, plus I was totally fine studying literature by myself, without my friends. This would be the perfect chance for me to boost my self esteem a little. I loved my friends, especially Ellie, but admittedly, we sometimes blocked each others ways to grow in that department.
I spent my free period exploring the library which isn't a stunning one for an English university, but it didn't matter to me. What I was interested in was the volume of it and time flew by in seconds while I let Rimbaud's poetry sink in. I assumed that my face would hurt at the end of the day from smiling so much, since I had realized how many opportunities life had to offer from this moment on. I could lend whichever book I wanted, I could study abroad sometime, I could meet new people, make new friends, maybe become a whole different and better version of myself along the way. I could be the person I always wanted to be, there were no limits and the way my life has changed in a matter of a few days was enormous. I prayed that this feeling would last forever.

After my long day at uni, I was looking forward listening to my friend's opinions on unilife and their day. I made my way across the parking lot to my bike, the weather at the end of September still had been nice enough to walk or bike. My happiness and euphoria was beyond my control, so I brought myself to call my noisy and worried mum who wouldn't let my phonescreen stay black for a minute throughout the day. Of course she picked up the phone right away and her soft voice made me smile.
"Darling! I have been messaging you, haven't you checked your phone?"
I managed to suppress the urge of letting out a sigh...I appreciated her caring nature but it was too much sometimes.
"Mum, I'm fine and I can't look at my phone when I'm in class." I informed her and sat on my bike, clenching the phone between my shoulder and cheek.
"I'm so happy to hear from you!" She exclaimed as if we were long-lost relatives. "How was your first day? Tell me everything, angel!"
And so I started telling her about the classes I had picked and my professors, trying to keep my phone in it's place until I suddenly lost control of my bike, bumping into the back side of a car with a strumming sound. My phone fell onto the ground while I jammed my leg between my bike and the rear light of the car.
"What the fuck" an infuriated, gravelly voice snapped and I didn't have to look up in order to realise that the owner of the car angrily got out of his vehicle.
"I'm so sorry!" I peeped, glancing at the man. My heart and every function of my brain freezed in that moment. I wasn't sure if my shock was the trigger or the fact that the appearance and energy of the person in front of me was enthralling in ways I couldn't fathom. His fierce eyes stared back at me, holding an expression probably different from mine. His slightly pink lips formed words I couldn't read or hear, since everything around me was blurry.
"Will you move now or what?" His sharp tone brought me back into reality and my surroundings crashed onto me all at once: The muffled sound of my mother's panicky voice on the ground, the fact that I just crashed into the car of a stranger who was obviously and justifiably enraged and the pain I felt in my leg and the embarrassment.
"I am so sorry, oh God, I lost control of my bike!" I uncomfortably repeated, trying to keep my eyes from watering. What the hell was going on with me, this would have been half as awkward if this guy wasn't this good looking. For a second I actually thought of running away, the situation made me feel so small and stupid and the heat in my face revealed my shame.
The boy's - or man's - expression softened slightly but the frown on his face didn't show the slightest inclination to disappear.
"Yeah, I saw that." He flatly replied, his voice still low and smoky and I came to the conclusion that his voice naturally has an angry touch to it. As he inspected the brake lights and the back of his car, I picked up my phone.
"- don't know what happened and I will call the police, if-" a snippet of my mum's panic attack rang into my ear.
"I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine!" I quickly enunciated. "I bumped into a car with my bike, but I am fine, Mum. I'm sorry, I'll call you back later." I explained and hung up. I took a deep breath, recollecting myself.
"Is the car okay?" I anxiously asked.
"It's just a small scratch. Be careful next time." He replied in a coarse tone and turned to leave, without bothering to look at me a second time. My shakey legs struggled to get on my bike again, but as soon as I managed to get on it, I made sure to leave the parking lot as fast as I could.