"Friends?.."

~7~

// Jimins POV //

It's scary..taking a risk like this. It could ruin everything. He could end up hating me, or even worse.

Me hating him...

No, I can't think like that. 

"You okay over there?" he snapped me out of my thoughts. 

"oh.. uh yeah i'm good." I said as I nervously picked up my drink. 

"Okay, if you say so.." he sighed out. 

We eat our food, with scenes of awkward silence every now and then. I wanted to say something but I had no words to say.. 

The painful awkwardness ended about 10 minutes later. We drove to his place. 

While in the car, I thought about everything little thing that could go wrong. I mean, why wouldn't I? Hoseok has been such a big part of my life for so long..I can't lose him. I gasped as I felt his warm hand grab mine. 

He has always been so kind to me. 

He raised my hand to his face and kissed the top of my hand. I melted in that moment. 

We arrived at his place.. 

// Taes POV //

Finally . 

Jungkook's hooker boyfriend left. 

I know he likes him but I don't want Jungkook to get hurt. I walked to my bedroom to unwind from everything that has been happening. I didn't realize how stiff my shoulders were. 

I mean I was stressed. I couldn't stop thinking about Jimin.

I just wish he could be mine, he deserves so much in this world. I simply cannot provide him. Maybe he is better off with Hoseok. He only sees me as a good friend, I'll never be seen as more in his eyes.

"Tae?" I heard Jungkook say from outside my bedroom door. 

"What, Jungkook?" I replied annoyed and irritated. 

"Can I talk to you before you turn in?" He seemed upset. I didn't mean to come off as rude, I'm just annoyed and tired from my own thoughts. 

I opened the door, he was looking down at his feet. I looked down too, until he started to look up. I continued to look up as well while still holding my door open. 

"What's the deal with you around my boyfriend?" I was zoned out, then I had realized what he just asked me. What was I supposed to say? Should I go ahead and tell him? My mind was going 100mph, trying to find the right sentence. 

"Hello??" He said while waving his hand in-front of my face. 

I cleared my throat..."Uh, nothing is wrong with him. I j-just uh thought I knew him from somewhere.." I scratched the back of my head and started to walk quickly into the kitchen. I was hoping he would just shrug it off. 

"You know him?" He sounded confused. Maybe, even a bit, embarrassed? 

"No, He just looked like someone I used to know.." I was looking through the cabinets so I wouldn't have to look at him. 

"oh..okay." He said relieved. "So what's up with you? Why are you so tense?" I was quiet, I couldn't tell him. No one knows I like Jimin, I'd like to keep it that way. 

"Did something happen to Jimin??" He pried so much. 

"No! Nothing happened!" I said loudly than I thought, I was panicking. 

"I'm sorry, it's been a rough day. Can we talk about something else?" I said disappointed with myself. 

"Uh..sure..What do you want to do for dinner?" I realized I still haven't eaten today. 

"Wanna go to Mingles?" I finally looked at him in the eyes. 

"Sure " He said with a smile. 

// Jimins POV //

As I stepped into his apartment, I remembered that night. I took a deep breath. Hobi noticed and took my hand immediately, giving me a warm smile. 

"Is that Joon guy here?" I blurted out ruining the moment. 

Hoseok looked at me surprised, I forget he doesn't see me as that type of person.

"No, he isn't here. Would that be a problem?" He got concerned. I immediately felt bad.

"N-No that wouldn't be a problem.." I took my hand back and started to walk towards the couch. 

Why do I keep ruining these moments? Will this even work? How can I love him the way he deserves if I can't even accept that I'm gay? I can't even kiss him proudly in-front of anyone.. I'll just fail him..

"Jiminie..what's wrong? You can talk to me, I'm a safe place." He put his hand on top of mine that was resting on my thigh. He is my safe place, but how do I tell him I'm afraid to be seen with him?

"Hobi...I don't want to hurt you.." Tears started to welt up, my voice shaking. I could feel my heart breaking. 

// Hoseoks POV //

No, no.. Jimin please don't. I could help him. Please don't leave me. I started to cry when I heard his voice shake. 

Bracing myself for the impact the words he was about to say would have on me. 

"Please...don't.." my voice sounded small and weak. 

I didn't want him to leave, I love him. 

"Jimin, whatever it is I-I can help y-you..." I stuttered out. 

// Jimins POV //

His emotions completely changed, making this way past the point of difficult. 

"I'm just so s-scared.." I said as I started to ball my eyes out into his chest. 

"I don't want to disappoint you, I can't be the man you need." I continued to cry out. 

"Jiminie, I know it's scary. I'm not asking you to change anything. I'm here no matter what." He said with a more determined voice than before. I always feel so safe with him. He was holding me rubbing my back as I sobbed into his lavender scented shirt. 

"You are perfect the way you are, Jimin." He pulled me back from his shirt and wiped my tears. It didn't matter, I was crying harder at this point. He gave me a warm smile, I could tell he was holding back tears. 

"We don't have to do anything you are uncomfortable with, I just want you to be comfortable." 

I looked down at my lap, trying to catch my breath. He lifted my chin so I was eye-level with him. 

"Jimin?" He said in a comforting tone. 

"yes..?" I shakily said back.

"I love you more than anything in this life. We will get through this."  

Did he just say that? He has never said the L word to me before. I sat there, mouth opened and wide eyed. Completely silent. 

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I know it's been forever. Life caught up with me:/ I really hope you guys enjoy this chapter. I'm really sorry if its messy. I got random motivation to write and it's messy. Give Feedback if you want!! xx