My One and Only (Hotch and Reader)

Chapter 2

It was with a heavy heart that I went to work the next morning. I tried to cover up the fact that I had been crying all night with makeup, but I had a feeling it wouldn't work. This feeling was confirmed when the team started giving me concerned looks, and asking if I was okay.

I smiled wanly, but I don't think I was fooling anyone. Thankfully though, they understood that I needed my space and didn't try to talk to me any further or console me. That's why I love these people, they understand me better than anyone else.

My eyes dart towards his office. His door was shut and the blinds drawn. I didn't want to think about what he was doing or with who, and tried to busy myself with other things. I didn't care, right? We were just friends, nothing more. We weren't even dating or anything, so I have no right to him, he is free to do what he wants with whomever he wants. I made it clear as much last night when I told him we couldn't be together. My heart seizes in pain, yet again, as I remember last night, which keeps on playing on repeat in my head. Over and over and over.

After a while, I hear his door open. I subtly lift my head to see who he had been with, and immediately wished that I hadn't.

"Bye, honey", Aaron says to Beth, kissing her

"Bye, baby, I'll be seeing you later", she says cheerfully, walking down the stairs. I avert my gaze as she walks by, not saying anything to her to alert her of my presence.

You don't realize how lucky you are to have a man like him, I say silently to her retreating back, you have no fucking idea.

It's at this moment that JJ announces that we have a case. Thank God. I need a distraction, anything to keep me from thinking about last night and Aaron kissing Beth in front of me. It was like a fucking knife was going through my heart repeatedly.

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Aaron's POV

When we gather in the roundtable room, and sit down, I notice Y/N's downcast red-rimmed eyes. She looks like she spent last night crying herself to sleep after she left my place in such a hurry. I remember vividly after kissing her and telling her that I wanted her, how she pushed me away and told me the words that still echo in my mind:
"I-I'm sorry, Aaron. We can't do this, it's wrong. You have a girlfriend already, and you're my best friend and boss. We can't be together like this."
I remember looking in her eyes and seeing the pain that those words caused her to say. And the image of her tear-streaked face as she left is something that will never leave my mind. I hated that I was the reason that she was in so much pain and agony. But yet, I had still kissed Beth in front of her today, which, to her, probably felt like a knife going through her still hurting heart. I know if the situation were reversed, I would feel the exact same way, watching her kiss a guy like it was nothing.
I've been with Beth for a while now, and up until yesterday, Y/N had been okay...well not okay with it, but had been accepting and tolerable of our relationship. And I loved that about her, and why our friendship was so strong, is that we agreed that even if we have girlfriends or boyfriends, we would still remain the best of friends, no matter what. But...now I don't know where we stand after last night, if we're still friends even or not. I want to talk to her about that, but I know that now isn't the right time, not when she's still so raw and hurting.
Fingers snap loudly, bringing me out of my thoughts.
"Hotch, man, are you okay?", Derek asks
"You totally spaced out on us for a while there", says Emily
I clear my throat, sit up straight, and say, "I'm fine, everyone. Now, where
were we?"
I see the questioning looks on everyone's faces, but thankfully they don't say anything else.

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I'm sitting in my office, later that night, after the case, doing some paperwork, (as usual), when I hear a small knock on the door.
I look at my watch, and am surprised to see how late it is, and that someone is even still here this late. Well, if they are here until now, it must be important.
"Come in", I answer. The door opens, and I am surprised to see none other than Y/N.
She comes in and sits down, knowing that she doesn't need to be invited to, because of how often she comes in here.
I go and sit down beside her, knowing why she's here.
"We need to talk about last night", we both say at the same time
She swallows nervously.
"You first", she says
"No, you came here to talk to me, so by all rights, you should go first", I point out
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Reader's POV