Multifandom (oneshots)

Harry Styles (dick allergy girl)

it was a great day. my mom had died 7 years ago. and my abusive alcoholic dad is beating the shit out of me as usual.

"HCCYJWNRPWUQUDUAJ!!"
dad said.

"okay coming." i replied. i learned the alcoholic language. one of my traits besides being pretty af (i think i look like a baboons ass but ok), having platinum blonde hair, perfect blue eyes, little nose and ofc freckles.

when i saw dad trying to do a handstand i immediately left. it was too much i couldn't take it anymore. so i went online and bought a one direction concert ticket.

because it was 2008.

then i went to the concert. it was good. harry (aka daddy hot mf bitch faced tamale) winked and blew a kiss at me. he also did a face where he was licking the air like crazy, i didn't understand what it might meant but it made blush.

because i blush.

ALL THE TIME

then i went to pee.

it was great harry had stopped singing and waited for me to come back from the bathroom and the others also did the same when harry told them.

i remade my perfectly winged eyeliner and my lipstick also curled my hair which took me 3 hours lol

when i came back one direction had started singing again.

then i sneaked into their rooms in the back. i saw harry and ran to him. then i threw up on him and then he smiled back.

"so she pukes;)" harry said.

then i blushed again.

can't help it lMAOOO

then i saw zain and followed him. we fucked that made harry upset i dunno why lol

so harry died then i was in this mf coma for like 48 years like what the fuck?! I NEEDED TO FUCK!

them i found zaym but he was this 65 yearlold grandfpa SO I WENT TO HARRYS GRAVE and become a witch.

then i brought him back to life.

but it had a cost.

now i was allergic to dicks.

NOW TELL ME YALL

HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET LAID NOW HUH?!?!!???

so i killed him again but before we had sex

yes it was hOt ;)

but also sneezy yknow

then yeah i died lol