Your typical life story.

Another Me?

It's been a while since I've been here haha. I'm going to start writing about how I've been feeling lately these past few weeks. It's been up and down for the most part. Sometimes in life, humanity needs to take a break from doing something they love in order to get better. As hard as that is, I had no choice. This chapter is about a fake entity living inside me. Causing me to create and see things they see. 

Life truly can be awful. I don't always explain these emotions to people because like I mentioned a couple times, I like to feel unique and be unique, but this unique is something far worse. I'm afraid if I let it all out, the people viewing this may think I'm insane and need help. That's one way to put it, but I'm different. I know how to fix it, only issues are, sometimes leaving everyone to do their thing and let them forget about me completely is a coping skill of mine I use, that way I won't have to worry about hurting others with my "unique" capabilities. I get cold inside and outside whenever I'm feeling lonely, it stops my whole process of life around, to let me ponder in silence, figure out what needs to be done, without thinking about it too hard, I narrow down all possible scenarios and either combine them together to make do with what I got, or, make one simple action. Unfortunately for my case, enough is never enough so I have to make more than one occurrence occur. 

Hey look I'm right on top of him! The bottom is sometimes me... Hard to explain. For now, I'm on top because I'm calm and not harmful. I don't intend on becoming harmful anytime soon disclaimer. I have good intentions as of currently. Let's cut to the chase. That's him on the bottom. Taking my heart and putting all hate into it. In Delta Rune, the main character is Kris, spoilers if you haven't noticed, you'll see why if you play the end of the game, compare me to Kris in this situation. I leave my body open for bad intentions to come in. It aches me to say that, sometimes I feel like if it's even worth talking to anyone after what I've seen and want to do. I don't do it of course, but one day it could become worse. I haven't done any damage as of yet, but in life sometimes you have to make mistakes that are wrong, not saying I want to do them, but out of curiosity and confusion. A new type of emotion, that changes me completely. It's horrifying to think about in my situation. I don't do it, but I think it. I'm getting stronger, more determined to get better, I don't see the results ending up in vain, especially around loved ones, I'm too soft to hurt them. They influence my power to do good, they are my other side's weakness to his success. As long as I'm around them, I'm sane. The thought of losing them however... Causes a different ending. A truly awful ending, in vain. Losing someone special to me causes me left open to anything to come at me. I'm vulnerable. Temporarily however. I can't say I'm never going to feel this way, but I can assure you, it works out. I'm surrounded by hundreds of friends. Who'll always take me in if I'm feeling his presence. No need to panic, I'll make it through this. 

Before I go, I want each and every viewer here to remember these quotes that keeps me going everyday, no matter who you are, there's always good satisfaction of making someone happy, and rewarding you for that. Keep in mind that when the world is shaking and the skies are grey with depression. "I'm a lover, not a fighter, but I'll fight for the people who I love." "Sometimes in life, you gotta beat the rough, by being the fluff." "Life isn't about how many breaths you take , but by the moments that take our breath away."