Wasteland

Chapter 9 - I Have What!?

The time turned 3:27 when I calmed down from the cursed nightmare. Martin looks over to me, his face looked focused but what on, I do not know. "Before the nuclear attack 2 years ago, I was studying psychology. Have you been having dreams about suicide on a regular basis?" Martin questioned me, well dreams about suicide really stared 13 months into scavenging and every night more or less. "I guess, about 11 months ago is when they started and they more or less happen every night," I told him, trying to understand what he's on to, "but I just thought they were because Ella stabbed her self and I thought she had committed suicide." Martin seemed unable to say what he wants to say, as if he needs to tell me but he doesn't want to. Instead he asked me a few more questions about my mental health and stuff.

He looks like he's about to tell me what he wanted to, he still had the expression that he doesn't want to. "Umm... Caitlyn? I'm pretty sure you suffer with a highly consistent case of severe depression..." Martin tells me finally. Depression...? I can't, I'm so happy. Most of the time... but how? Urgh so many questions whizz through my head. To be fair, the amount of mental breakdowns for no reason I've had could've been a very clear fucking sign. I'm just surprised I'm surprised now, all the signs when I was scavenging. "Is there anything to help it? Like obviously not cure it cause I'm pretty sure you can't cure depression but just something to help?" Ella suggests, her eyes I hope that it can be helped. "I... I don't know... I was in a middle of a lecture when the nuclear alarm went off," Martin said as if he's a disappointment. "It's fine, as long as I've got you two, I'll be fine," I reassured them both, will I though?