The darkness in my mind (villain Deku)

False hope

*disclaimer!* this chapter is really angsty for poor izuku but i couldn't think of any other way into easing into the story so bare with me. Whelp here goes nothing!
Warning, attempted suicide

(Scene takes place right after All might tells izuku he cant be a hero)

Izukus heart pounded in his ears as he stared out blankly to the spot were his hero once stood before him. The same phrase repeated continuously through the green haired boys head and he felt tears prick his wide open eyes.
He was told the heart breaking reality of his situation by his one idol the man he aspired to be, and he just told him no... Air seemed to solidify and izuku couldn't breath. His lungs caved in on themselves and he was frozen in place, to stunned to move. seconds passed but to the heart broken boy if felt like years.
His insides changed and He no longer felt like a young giddy kid with a dream. He now felt aged beyond his years and as his mind aged he couldn't come to terms with the truth. it slowly started to sink in that all his efforts were just a wast of time. The life he had been planing to live was hopeless. What was even more shattering is that he knew this all along. He just couldn't admit to it. He had clung onto this hope like a life line. And now that he was truly cut off, he was hurt more then any physical wound could.

For the first time since All Might spoke he stumbled forward his gaze drifted from the spot of his now absent hero and to the horizon. The day was beautiful and the wether was nice. It didn't match what Izuku felt at all. He stared out and for a split second his child hood friends voice could be heard whispered in the breeze. While he stood there slightly hunched over on shaky knees, his gazed landing over the roof top from were he was everything felt hopeless to him.

"Should i- "

he thought miserably. He took hesitant steps towards the ledge and with each one his legs shook with the pressure and realization of what his body was doing. He was scared and his body was screaming at him to turn around and go home, but what would he do then? He hesitantly took his left step and stood on the very edge, any one could push him and he'd fall to his doom, even the wind could tip him over with how little control he had over his body at the moment. He was walking a tightrope and one wrong move, wrong twitch or breath could send him down. He gazed outward with no emotion despite what he was doing, his eyes were distant and it was hard to distinguish the way he felt from afar. Inside though he knew it was gut wrenching despair, here stood the same visible Izuku Midoriya but inside he had died. It was far to hard to believe that izuku had already given up.

He was always a weak but determined kid, were was his determination now. It had blown away with the wind, like he wished he could.

Soon enough he reminded himself.

Taking one last breath of fresh air he took his friends words to heart and tilted, not daring a look down. Instead he thought to him self.

"I really am weak"

And just like that he dove like the wounded swan he was.

He plummeted to the ground in slow motion and took his time in hating every last cell in himself for actually jumping. He once said that no ones words would affect him. Yet here he was falling by Kaccans suggestion and because of All Mights statement.

Wind whipped him in the face and his hair swayed all around, he was bracing for impact when a blackish dark purple mist erupted from the steadily closing in ground. Before he had the chance to react in any way his body thudded to solid ground. Making his body bend in un natural ways. Before he could even scream he had blacked out.

His very last thought still rung in his head though reminding him once again of how helpless he really was...

"I really cant accomplish anything..."

Sorry for the spelling errors and i promise that the next chapters will make more sense!
Word count = 743