Hanging with Sorrow

Chapter 16

"It's all my fucking fault."

Damian paced the floor of the bat cave, his concerned brothers and teammates standing to the side, watching him. Batman was quickly typing on his computer, searching for any clues on where the Joker might've taken Raven.

"I shouldn't have gotten angry. I should've listened, should've understood that she does care for me. I'm just too fucking stupid to listen." Damian wheeled around, punching the nearest wall. Ignoring his throbbing hand, which was rapidly bleeding out onto the floor, he continued to pace the floor.

"Stop it," Dick practically growled, grabbing Damian's arm to prevent him from pacing any more. "It might look like your fault, but really it would've happened anyways. The Joker would've kidnapped her regardless of the fact that she was outside."

"Don't you understand?" Damian hissed, yanking his arm from Dick's grip. "It is my fault. If I hadn't punched the Joker at that stupid charity ball, he wouldn't have wanted revenge on me."

"You saved your life, and countless others!" Dick shouted, once again grabbing Damian's shoulders. "Yes, maybe you were a little excessive with the punches, but if you hadn't taken him down it would've been too late. Bruce didn't have enough time to get there, and the rest of us were in the middle of the crowd."

"Whatever." Damian yanked his arm out of Dick's grip, scowling as he looked at his watch. It had been exactly three hours, twenty eight minutes, and eighteen seconds since he had found out about the note. Damian felt like pulling his hair out- he was so, so frustrated. He wanted to see Raven's laugh again, watch her as she covered her smile with a pale hand. He couldn't stand the thought that she was gone, especially since she probably thought he hated her.

That couldn't be further from the truth.

Damian didn't understand why he had to be fucking stupid. How could he not see that Raven genuinely cared for him? He felt a pang of shame as he thought of all the nasty words he yelled at Raven just hours earlier. Why did he have to be such a jerk? Why couldn't he have just listened?

"I think I got something," Bruce said gruffly, snapping Damian out of his self hate session.

"What?!" Damian demanded, going to look over Bruce's shoulder.

"It's this graffiti," Bruce said, zooming in on a surveillance camera in a back alley. "It's a Joker card, exactly like one you'd find in a standard deck of cards."

"You thinking the Joker left it?" Dick asked, doubt written all over his face.

"Not sure, but we don't have any other leads." Bruce admitted, glancing backwards at the numerous amount of people standing behind him. Pushing backwards in his chair, he stood up, and put his hand on his blood son's shoulder in a fatherly gesture. "We'll find her, Damian. You'll have your second chance."

"I just hope that it won't be too late," Damian whispered, a bitterness creeping into the words.

...

Clowns.

There were hundreds, possibly thousands. They floated around her mind, taunting her. They swirled around her, and it felt like she was suffocating. Just as she thought she was going to die, a raven came swooping around the clowns, dispersing them. She reached her arms gratefully towards the pretty bird, hope rekindled inside her, hope that she would make it out of this hellhole alive. Something tickled the surface of her memory. It didn't matter. It wasn't important.