drowning in insecurities

four • when they found out

Here's part two, the last part of this memory.

Sara, age 6, was wondering why her mom suggested going to the "skin specialist". Is that a type of doctor? she thought. She never liked doctor appointments – the bitter medicine and injections, especially waiting in a room where there are so many germs around.

"But mama, why do we have to go though?" she asked.

"Because I don't know much about this,"  her mom sighed, "I rather have a specialist to help us diagnose this."

"What's diagnose, mama?"

"To identify an anomaly, something unusual going in the body."

"Oh."

"So, do you want daddy to know about this?"

"I don't know, he might think I'm not normal."

"We'll just see. I'll tell him, alright?"

"Alright."

Later in the night, Sara's dad came home from work after she and her mom had dinner.

"Hey, sweetie," he said, coming up to Sara.

"Hi, daddy," she replied as she was about to be carried by her dad.

"Ow, daddy, you're grabbing my waist too hard," Sara groans after being carried for around a minute.

"Sorry, baby," he said, putting her down. Whilst he did that, his eyes darted to her left hand.

"Uhm, Anna," he looked pitifully to her mom, "what happened to your daughter? Doesn't she know that markers shouldn't be used to draw on herself at this age?"

"Alexander Kneifer! Don't talk about our daughter like that," her mom mildly spat at him, "I think you've forgotten that she's still right next to us."

"Sara, please go up, brush your teeth and sleep. Your mom and I need a talk."

"No, Sara, stay here."

"I want to leave her out of this."

"Too bad, she's staying here. It's only 7 pm now! Maybe 30 minutes more."

"Fine."

"Alex, are you thinking she's insane somehow?"

"What, she's no witch, they only exist in Harry Potter!"

"You're not answering my question."

"Then yes! I've never even seen these type of things before. She's way too young to get tattoos and all that sort of stuff."

"Guess what? I thought the same, but when Sara was born, I was told that there's a new scientific discovery found on the skin, known as conectuntur pellis. It's an anomaly, according to them."

"What is that?"

"In Latin, it means inked skin. Basically, it looks like a tattoo, but she doesn't feel as much pain, I guess? It just comes and goes."

"Is this the first time it happened?"

"Yes."

"Are you planning to go anywhere tomorrow?"

"I'm letting Sara skip school tomorrow. She's so scared to go to school, one classmate asked her about it and then she was so embarrassed she cried for two hours straight."

"Seriously? SARA KNEIFER, WHY WOULD YOU WASTE TWO PRECIOUS HOURS OF LEARNING LIKE THAT, SULKING ABOUT THAT BOY?!"

"She's not you, Alex. Please know that."

"I do know that! She shouldn't spend that amount of time just on that boy though!"

"Sara, do you know the boy's name?"

"Richard."

"Alex, what's on your agenda tomorrow?"

"I don't really have much, just working and hoping for calls. Been like that since last week, not much done."

"Okay, could you possibly go to Sara's school tomorrow? I'll bring you there, then bring you to the front desk, then we'll go and take Sara to a skin specialist. I'll just go to the one we took Sara to as a baby to get her allergies diagnosed."

"Sure. I'll have enough time to go to the office from there too, right? If I'm not wrong, I think I have to meet someone."

"ALEX, WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME THAT EARLIER?! WHAT TIME DO YOU HAVE THAT MEETING?"

"It's at 3 pm, no need to worry."

"Yes, I have to worry! I don't even know how long it'll take to get everything done."

"It should be quick, shouldn't it?"

"Ask Sara to wake up at 8:30, then we'll leave the house at 9. Should reach there at 9:10, the meeting will be for 20 minutes, there'll be 5 minutes to recess then. After that, going to the skin specialist, for maybe an hour or two? Then lunch, and I'll bring you to where you need to meet. Where though?"

"Let me check."

Sara's dad goes onto his phone, texting his colleague about where to meet. Two minutes later, he got a reply.

"I got it, Anna, it's at IMM. Do you want to bring Sara along?"

"Sure, we'll go somewhere else so Daniel, is it?.., doesn't suspect anything."

"Yes, it's Daniel, and great."

"We'll need to call the doctor to schedule an appointment. If they can't do anything about it, there will have to be the hospital."

"Alright. But I still find it quite devastating to send Sara at this age."

"We'll have to, or else it'd get worse. Maybe we'll go to a different skin specialist in the hospital, and if they can't do anything, there's at least a way to do DNA testing in another section."

"Good point, let's do it."

"Perfect. Sara, please go upstairs, brush your teeth and go to sleep. We'll have a long day tomorrow."

"Alright. Good night, mama, good night, papa."

"Night, sweetie."

Sara reluctantly went up the stairs to her parents' bedroom. As she didn't want to go in too soon, she sat at the corner of the staircase, hoping they wouldn't notice she was there.

"Alex, please," her mom sighed, "even though she might have this, please promise that you'll be there for her no matter what."

"I don't know anymore," her dad replied, "we have to spend money to see him, and I'm not sure if you want to do blood testing plus DNA."

"Fair enough, but we want the best for our daughter. I just want her to be happy, you know?"

"Yeah, I understand, but I don't want her to go through more hassle. From allergies to this?  I can't believe it."

"Same here, but as I said, I want the best for her, no matter what happens. But sometimes, we can't do that all the time."

"Yeah, that's true. Where's dinner? I haven't had mine yet."

"There's a meal waiting for you on the island table – hope it isn't too cold now."

"I hope so too."

After that, Sara figured out that it was the time to go to bed. Like her parents said, the next day would be a long one, so she had to be prepared for that.