The Silent Scream | Aphmau AU Fanfiction

Eleven/Eleven

Mom didn't come back. Dad came in after an hour and stood beside me, looking quite nervous. "Do you really want to... go?"
   I quickly nodded. "Are you going to let me?"
   "Well..." He sighed a little. "We'll try and couple of things, and if you stay persistent..."
   "DAD!" Melissa stood. She saw how hopeful I looked.
   He started picking at dead skin. "It wasn't my decision, it was your mother's. We'll try therapy for a bit longer and try a couple of things. If you still say that you want to go then maybe we'll let you."
   "That's illegal!" Melissa said.
   He shook his head and sighed. "Do you want to keep watching him suffer?"
   "Well, no, but that doesn't mean you should let him die! You can just put him in an insane hospital or get him antidepressants!"
   "Neither are going to help." I said. I looked up at dad. "Take out the tubes."
   "I can't." He responded, sitting on the edge of the bed. "You're going to have to deal with them for a while."
   My eyes filled with tears. "But I don't want to live any longer!"
   "I'm afraid want doesn't get." He said, putting his face in his hands. I shut up.
   "Where's mom?" Melissa asked.
   "I made her go home. She's in a bad state."
   "She was the one who came up with the idea? You're sure? It doesn't seem like she'd be okay with it. Like you said, she's in a bad state."
   He sighed. "She said it. I was the one who didn't approve." He looked at me. "I hope you realize how much you're hurting her right now. She could barely walk. I had to get a co-worker to drive her back."
   I whimpered quietly immediately. "Good, you should feel bad." He muttered.
   "Dad." Melissa glared at him.
   "Well, he should." 
   I gave up on being 'sensible' and started removing the tubes from my arm. Dad saw but didn't stop me. Melissa tried to stop me but I didn't give up so easily. Once I had finally disconnected them all, I tried to remove mask. The second it came off, my heart rate machine stopped beating. My throat closed in and I couldn't breathe, but I didn't care.
   Dad groaned and stopped ignoring me. He put it back on my face and the beeping restarted. He glared at me. "Stop it."
   I then started crying hard. A doctor walked in because of the heart machine. "What happened? His heart stopped."
   "He's just being stupid." Dad mumbled. He sighed a little. "He just has mental issues."
   The doctor nodded understandingly. They probably had a lot of suicidal people coming in. He walked over and put the tubes back. Half way through, I got angry at it and started trying to take them out. The doctor gave up and stood up straight. He looked at dad. "We can't force treatment."
   "I'm aware of that." He said. "How much longer until he should leave?"
   "If those tubes stay in, I'd about ten hours. Electrocution is normally lethal, your son was lucky, again."
   Dad sighed a little. "Okay. Melissa, can you go and get me coffee?"
   She shook her head. "I'm not your servant." She said as the doctor left.
   "I'll give you $100."
   "Add another zero."
   He looked at her and glared. "$150. Take it or leave it." She groaned and got up, taking his wallet, and then left. Dad rolled his eyes and tried to put in the tubes instead. I pulled them out straight away.
   "Stop it." Dad said, and then hit my cheek hard. Afterwards he continued to put the tubes back in. I gave up fighting. I purposely stopped breathing and refused to breathe in the oxygen. Dad hit me again but I didn't stop. Eventually the machine shut up again.
   He then started panicking. Despite being outside, the doctor didn't come in. Dad quickly tried to think of a way to make me breathe out and hit my crotch. I screamed in pain and covered it as if it would help. I sobbed loudly but did start breathing again. The beeping resumed.
   "STOP IT!" He yelled, and I noticed tears in his eyes, shocking me.
   "I'm sorry!" I said out of surprise.
   He kept trying to wipe away the tears but they kept spilling. He gave in to them and rest his forehead on my chest. I stayed still because the tubes would remove if I tried to hug him. "I-I'll stop trying for a while." I said for pity. Even in this situation, he wouldn't cry to get what he wanted.
   "A while isn't long enough." He said.
   I whimpered a little more. "Dad-"
   "I know. You don't want to live. I get it. But this hurts more than you think it does."
   "Two months." I mumbled.
   "A year." He said, looking up at me. "I'll do anything, just don't go yet."
   I started shaking. "U-Uh... How about until I die naturally, but you let me go out?"
   "DEAL!" He quickly stood up straight.
   I smiled a little. "Thank you." I whisper.
   "A-Anything else?" He tried to wipe away his tears.
   "I think I'm bisexual." I mumble.
   His hand stopped moving and his face went blank. He slowly looked down at me. "How do you know? You haven't started dating anybody."
   "No, but I have an iPad and YouTube access. I don't think straight people drool over both guys and girls."
   I look down. "I'm sorry."
   "Why are you sorry?" He asked, confused.
   "I thought you'd be okay with it."
   "I am!" He said quickly. "I am, I am, sorry. Did it feel like I wasn't?" I nodded. "Well I am." He said, then kissed my forehead. I blushed as he never did it often.
   "I love you." I mumble.
   "Love you too, son, even if I don't show it." He said, and sighed a little. He smiled anyway. I'm just going to have to deal with all of this. I don't want to see him suffer.