The Sweet Song

Lets talk about my phobias and more

I just wanted to talk to you about this because these are serious things I experience and blah blah blah.

So first I have three phobias and I will list them bellow

condylacousticophobia: the fear or hatred of the sound of cracking bones.
So first off... there are lots of people who will call me out for this saying it's weird and not a real thing but it is! If I hear cracking bones or popping knuckles I will gag and there have been cases where I pass out. I will go completely pale and just...it's not good.

Next we have
AquaPhobia: this is mainly a fear of water which I don't really have because as a mermaid you know I'm not supposed to BUT as I read about it more this is very relatable to my case. Do to this phobia people will imagine their deaths in the ocean. Drowning, gasping for air, animal attacks, and so much more. So my big fear is drowning and not being able to breath so this very much is a phobia of mine.

And lastly...
Thanatophobia: this is an anxiety/fear of ones own death. I have a huge fear of dying and...
(⚠️warning: following consists of disturbing images and scary concepts⚠️)
Dying and then going no where. If there were no heaven or hell and I'd just be in darkness thinking but I wouldn't be think cause I'm dead and not actually there and...it's just a hard thing to think about and it makes me cry.

Next!!!!

Okay so when I was little I was born with a hole in my heart and that resulted in later pain and I had some kind of disease type thing and all that resulted in me now having heart pains when I have anxiety and getting them randomly as well. But that's morning I could tell you about that any time BUT!

I also had a bad problem with my stomach! The tube type things that help my waste get to where it needs to we're turning inside out. So the doctor explained it like grabbing a sock from the inside and pulling it inside out. This processes for me was extreme PAIN! If the tubes turned inside out guess what happens? My waste goes all through my body and kills me. So they were going to do surgery BUT a family got in a horrible car crash and so they were like "we're gonna have to wait it out" and we did and it got better but I could of died! You can not believe me if you want but I wouldn't lie about this!

So lastly my biggest problem...
Anger issues:
These issues for me are mainly caused due to people but I also get mad at everyday things like when I fail. I become uncontrollably angry. And it feels like someone spilled oil on my heart and watched it drip. It could bring me to a point where I'd physically hurt myself or scream and worse case punch/slap someone. I won't go into too much detail cause this is a happy book but just though you all should know!