I Remember the Days

Chapter 1

I hate school. Ok not school as whole, but rather the process i go through before school. The amount of foundation and concealer I use to hid my blue complexion is unreal. 

I also hate the heaviness of secrets. Everyone has secrets at school now and i never really know who they're about. Me, the girl who is constantly third wheeling. in between groups. Standing out while trying to fit in; Charlie,  has her thing. Books. Art. Cuteness. Bold. Part of one group and happy; Devon, somehow manages to juggle so many subjects, Brains. Music. Organised. Stressed, part of several groups but always involved with drama.

Of course more than 3 people go to my school, but these are the main people in my school life. They are hardly in my classes, but they are the ones who keep me sane when they world feels upside down.  

That's another thing I hate: people saying stuff to your face before asking questions

"you know, it wouldn't hurt just to try sometimes"

"You find school so easy"

"you wouldn't know hardship if it hit you in the face"

"i'm sure you"ll find a boyfriend one day"

i block these off most days. As someone once told me, what's the point of living through Hell if you can't take that moment to smile at the Devil

So that's what I do. I smile and nod. Sometimes I walk off in a different direction, sometimes I change the subject. They don't tend to bring me down, as grains of sand have no weight, but its when they build up that comments take their toll. Dragging me down deeper and deeper into an endless ocean of despair. The sand grains are all around me. In my hair. In my eyes. Mouth. Ears. Nose. They consume me. Eating me up from within. 

It takes time for them to go. For me to remember to let go. That opinions don't have to rule my world. I have to remind myself that this queen is not going to let the ignorants hit her with comments and push her down. This queen is going to rise. And she is a force to be reckoned with.

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"Charlie, what are you wearing?" From her tone of voice it became apparent that Mrs Lancaster did not approve of Charlie's variation of the school uniform.  The plaid skirt had been given a new hem well above the approved length. It had also had been bleach sprayed in certain areas to give of a slight worn urban vibe. The badges on the blazer had nothing to do with gaining positions of authority in the school community. Her shoes also did not coincide with the uniform rules, but were less of a problem then everything else. "This is clearly unacceptable to be worn on school premises"

"School uniform. And it's a much better version than what Annah Dixon wore last week" Charlie had always been one to quickly retort without thinking of the repercussions. Looking at her fighting, it reminds me of my past. How I used to do the same. How I try sometimes, but the past is like a ghost, and it haunts you.

"yes, I know Annah Dixon wore that monstrosity last week, but she was doing it for charity. But this," she gestured towards Charlie's clothes "This is just you being a defiant teenager"

"Annah was wearing a bin bag with weird frills attached and her 'charity money'  went to fund her weed adiction. So if you want me to wear this for the same reason as Annah Dixon I happily will" Charlie started walking off to were i was sitting. Mrs Lancaster hates her, but for some reason it always is the case that Charlie wins every argument. As she walks past the bench I'm sat, i jump up to talk about her 'victory' over the teacher. 

"And you wonder why the teachers hate you."

"Shut up Alyia. It's not Like you're a teacher's pet."

"yeah, but at least I don't argue with them right before I have a test"

"Shit. We've got English now don't we." I still don't get how Charlie doesn't revise for tests, yet scores in the 90s. We'd skipped assembly for the only reason that we didn't want to go, so were now walking to our English room.

"And guess who writes the questions and can change them at any given point in time"

"i actually want to kill her sometimes." One of the Ignorants was talking again. Another grain of sand added.

"you don't mean it though, do you?" 

"Oh come on. It's just a figure of speech. Sometime I do wonder where you've been your whole life" 

I just smile and nod. The bell rang as we turn the handle for the door to the room. And there she stood. looking over at us, the last to arrive, as we enter the room. Mrs Lancaster begins writing  on the board. This is different to other tests we've done. The question is normally typed on a piece of paper in a past paper style. She finished writing the question and before i could even finish reading, I felt Charlie's seething stare directed towards the teacher. Maybe she was going to live up to her words.

'School uniforms should be regulated and enforced in all schools. Write an essay on this subject making sure to add your own view points'