The Past Catches Up

Chapter 4

The room was a pale, matted white with dull grey carpet that reminded Anthony of an elementary school classroom and a potted plant with dying leaves sat forgotten in a corner. The thumping of Kalel’s finger on the armrest of his chair was a little unsettling. He took her hand and gave it a light squeeze of reassurance, flashing a weak smile to her.

“Thanks for doing this for me, sweetheart,” she smiled back through glossy peach colored lips.

He looked into her light, prettied-up eyes and thought he saw a small wisp of sadness, but it vanished before he could find out if it really was there.

“No problem babe,” he smiled warmly, kissing her cheek. The smile faded into a frown when he turned away from her though.

I don’t even know why the hell we’re here, he thought bitterly.

This is all Ian’s fault. If he hadn’t of opened his stupid idiotic mouth while he was drunk, Kalel wouldn’t have dragged him to this pointless quack’s office in the first place.

The receptionist’s voice suddenly snapped him out of his thoughts.

“Cullen, Padilla,” She called out, hardly even interested in who they were. “Dr. Gibbard will see you now.”

“Fucking finally,” Anthony muttered under his breath, just out of Kalel’s earshot. It was bad enough waiting there for an eternity, but the fact that this had to cut into his work time was just making it worse, especially since it meant Ian had to edit the channel’s main video without him, doubling his workload. He was still mad enough as it is at Anthony, and this just added a whole other thing to Ian’s list of reasons to hate him.

They walked into the office, Kalel with her arm around his waist into a room filled with framed certificates, a few couches, a desk, and a large window overlooking the city.

“Hello, you must be Kristen and Anthony. I’m Dr. Gibbard,” an older man with glasses greeted.

“I prefer Kalel,” she smiled back as she shook his hand.

“Okay, Kalel. Please, have a seat. Make yourselves comfortable.”

Anthony and Kalel sat down.

“So I understand this is your first time seeing a physiatrist,” he asked, adjusting his glasses and pulling out a clipboard from his desk.

Kalel was gripping Anthony’s hand and nodded. Anthony took in a long breath and sighed.

This is gonna be a long day.

~

 Ian had a lot going through his mind.

True he didn’t think he was a perfect match for Melanie, but that didn’t mean that he didn’t love her. He wanted to be friends, because hell. That’s basically what their relationship was the whole time; friends with benefits.

And then there was Anthony.

He could just kick himself over how he treated Anthony. He knew he didn’t deserve being yelled at like that.

Did he really think their relationship was a mistake? Or that by being the way he is isn’t… normal?

Maybe he overreacted. But even then, how can he just dismiss five month just like that? He didn’t understand it. Sure if they had just experimented it probably would have lasted a few days, a week maybe, who knows. But that long?

He suddenly felt old feelings resurfacing, ones he tried for so long to force himself to forget.

He thought back to the way Anthony would playfully call him names and then kiss him to remedy his poutiness. All the times they almost got caught at sleepovers at their parent’s house kissing or doing… other things. He blushed at the memory.

Oh God. The feeling were coming up like a geyser, flooding his brain with emotion.

“Stop,” he firmly told himself. “He doesn’t love you anymore. You don’t love him anymore…”

Ian looked at his progress on the Smosh video and realized he’d hardly gotten anything done. He sighed loudly and got up to go to the kitchen to get a snack when he heard the doorbell ring.

It was Melanie.

“Hey,” he mumbled, only briefly looking at her.

“Hi,” she answered back quietly.

“C-come in,” he said, making space for her.

She took a few steps in and he closed the door.

“Is Anthony here?” She asked.

“No, he’s with Kalel at some therapy thing.”

“Oh.”

Neither said anything for a while.

Ian cleared his throat.

“You’re here to pick up your stuff.”

She nodded grievously which only made him feel worse. He could tell she had been crying by how her mascara had smeared and had been wiped from her eyes in a poorly desperate attempt to hide it.

“Ian, I love you,” She choked out, unable to hold back.

“I love you too,” Ian automatically answered, going in to embrace her.

She stopped him.

“But…” She added with a hand on his shoulder. “We can’t keep doing this to ourselves. We’re not committed.”

Ian nodded and backed away.

“Can we at least still be friends?” He murmured.

“I don’t know.”

Ian sighed.

“I’m sorry, Ian.” She whispered, bringing a hand to her face.

“Well I hope he treats you better than I did,” Ian suddenly said. He didn’t mean it to come off as aggressive as it did.

Melanie didn’t say anything and went to the spare bedroom to gather her things.

His emotions seemed to be all in a jumble. It was strange that he was suddenly jealous of the other guy, yet he didn’t want to be in a relationship with Melanie anymore. It was strange that the feelings for Anthony he had locked away for so long were beginning to emerge.

Why did life have to be so goddamn confusing?